Page 52 of Slave

“Okay. Let’s try it. How would you rate your level of discomfort last night?” I noticed her breathing quicken, and I reached out to touch her face. Her breath started to calm. “Stay with me,” I whispered. “What number?”

“Nine,” she whispered.

Interesting. She’d been in a full panic attack and yet she had not said ten. That made me a little nervous. What would she consider a ten?

But instead of commenting, I nodded and moved on. “From now on, I want you to remember this number system. If you ever get to an eight, I want you to say the word yellow. If you get to a ten, I want you to say the word red. Can you do that?”

“Yes, Master.”

“Good. Now, we are going to do some experimenting today.”

I felt her body immediately tense. “What number, Brianna?”

“Six.”

“Why?”

“I’m . . . scared.”

Stepping toward her, I cupped her face with my hands. “What do you fear?”

“I’m afraid you’ll hurt me,” she whispered, obviously scared that her answer would upset me.

I gave her a half smile to try and ease her anxiety. “Do you remember that five you gave me earlier? What happened to that?”

Her eyes closed. I felt her trying to find that faith again, and I was grateful.

“I need you to place your trust in that,” I said softly. “Do you think you can?”

“Yes,” she whispered back.

I knew just that little yes was difficult for her. She really was placing her trust in me, and I cherished it.

Leaving her standing in the living room, I went into my bedroom and found a black scarf. We may not get to all I had planned, but I wanted to be prepared. Tucking it into my pocket, I grabbed my jacket off the back of my chair and returned to Brianna. She was standing right where I’d left her, not that I’d expected anything else.

“Would you like to take a jacket with you? It might be a bit chilly.”

“Yes, Master,” she answered.

I could tell she was still nervous by the slight shakiness to her voice, but she quickly disappeared into her room and came out with a spring jacket I’d seen her wear only once prior.

Before I led her out the door, I took her chin in my hands and said, “Today is about trust. Remember that.”

Brianna

I tried to be brave as we drove. What was happening didn’t make sense. Although truthfully nothing had really made sense since this man had come into my life.

There were times when he could make me forget what I was, even if it was only for a brief second. And then other times, there was no doubt that I belonged to him. But even then it felt different than it had when I was with Ian.

When he’d asked me to rate how much I trusted him on a scale of one to ten, I’d really had to think hard. I knew I shouldn’t trust him at all, and yet somehow I did. He’d never been unkind to me. Yes, there were rules, and he expected them to be followed, but at least I knew what they were, and they were things I could do.

And when I’d messed up, he’d handed out his punishment and then it was over. He didn’t yell at me or continue to make me pay for messing up for days. Of course the no-books rule had lasted for a week, but in that time, he’d never brought it up, never rubbed it in my face. It was for that reason that I’d told him five in the end.

To say I fully trusted him would be a lie, and he would have known that. I still remembered the hard look in his eyes when he’d told me that I could give him no greater insult than to lie to him. It was something I never wanted to know the consequences of.

He came to a stop in the parking lot of what looked to be a mall. We both got out of the car, and I followed him as he walked inside. I felt my anxiety begin to rise a little at the prospect of being so close to all these people in a busy place, but I tried to remember that I was not alone. Master was with me.

Taking my hand, he led me into the mall and the crowds. As we moved, I could feel the air around me shifting as people came close and then moved away. I closed my eyes, trying to calm myself, and then suddenly we stopped.

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