Page 42 of Reckoning

“Don’t talk,” I barked out. I swallowed and tried to soften my voice. I could yell at him later. “The doctor is coming.”

He shook his head slightly brow furrowed in pain. His eyes were still closed. “Not hospital.”

“No, of course. Your dad won’t find out.”

“Yang is on his way.” Joshua knelt beside me once more. “Open your eyes for me, Meyer.”

He squeezed his eyes tighter for a moment, then pried them open slowly. He fixated on me, mouth trying to form words, but no sound came out.

I put my hand over his mouth, then jerked it away, afraid it would hinder his already labored breathing. “It’s fine, Meyer. Everything is going to be okay.”

“I hope your head hurts like hell.” Joshua snapped his fingers in front of his face, and Meyer looked at him instead. “Keep your eyes open. You might OD again once this wears off.”

“I’m fine.” The words were forced through his teeth but still sounded weak. I jerked my hands away, leaving a trail of red blood on one cheek. He looked at me again, then touched his face.

“You’re not fine.” Guess the time for yelling was now. “You almost fucking died. You might still die.” I stood and walked away. I couldn’t fucking look at him right now. Jesus, what was his plan? He was just going to leave me here? What would have happened when Conrad found out his only son had died while I was in the next room?

I knew what would have happened. He would have annihilated me. I probably wouldn’t have lasted the day. The idiocy of my own plan revealed itself to me in the same instant. Killing Meyer would have been an instant death sentence for me. And here we were, both trying to do each other in on the same night without realizing it.

Meyer’s voice was stronger now, but still thick. “Maddie …”

I froze. Not Mads. Not Madeline. Maddie. The name he’d called me just before he tried to kill himself.

When had that happened?

“Goddammit, Meyer.” I fell next to him again, not caring how my knees rang when they clacked against the tile. “You tried to leave me.” My voice cracked into a sob halfway through the sentence.

Joshua helped him sit up against the tub. He was breathing heavily, but his lungs sounded clear. He reached for my hand once more. “You’re bleeding.”

“I wanted to kill you.” Whoops. Why did I say that?

He coughed out one mirthless laugh. “Beat you to it. Well, tried to.”

God, I could just slap him.

He rolled his head toward me. One hand lifted, a finger tapping against my closed lips. “Why didn’t you let me die?”

I huffed out a breath, assured for the moment that he wasn’t going to suddenly expire. I opened my mouth, but nothing came out. There was no explanation why I brought my sworn enemy back to life, not one I wanted to share with him.

He nodded and closed his eyes when I didn’t speak, and I was surprised to see tears fall down his face. Men didn’t cry, at least not men like Meyer Schaf. “I’m so tired, Maddie. I couldn’t live in fear for one more day. Every day is a struggle to get out of bed, go to work, and see him there. I flinch every time he raises his hand.”

I tried to tamp down my anger. He lived in fear? He was afraid of being struck?

“I just can’t do it anymore, Maddie. Having you is just another test that I’m bound to fail sooner or later. You’d be better off without me around to fuck things up.”

My fingers dug into his forearm. “What the hell do you think would have happened to me when I woke up and found you dead?”

“I left a note,” he whispered. “For Joshua.”

Before I could reply, Joshua’s phone pinged. He leaped to his feet and ran from the bathroom. “Doctor’s here. Can you get him into bed?”

I threw Meyer’s arm around my shoulders and helped him to stand, his heavy weight draped over my back while we struggled to the bed. He was still drunk enough to make this difficult even without the added side effects of the pills. Why did Joshua leave me with this task? He fell onto the mattress as Joshua re-entered with an Asian man in pajamas, likely the doctor.

“I didn’t bother to dress,” he said by way of introduction. He looked from Meyer to me. “Leave, please. I need to be alone with my patient.”

Meyer spoke before I could reply. “She stays.”

“I’d listen to the doctor, Meyer.” I dragged my hand from where he clasped it between his. “Focus on not dying right now. I can’t go anywhere.” I ran for the door before he could protest further. I needed some space. And I had to find that note.

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