Page 54 of Hannah's Truth

“He’s old enough to come down this way on his own.”

“Oh. I see.”

His gaze snapped to hers and he worried she really did see right through him. She had the blanket down now and took aseat, motioning him to join her. He couldn’t. They’d come out here to talk freely, but he was suddenly too pissed off to be logical.

“What do you think you see?” Her hesitation irritated him just that much more. “Tell me,” he snapped.

“I don’t like thinking about the cartel’s activity any more than you do. They’re violent, immoral, and profiting from the destruction of people and communities. We need to do everything in our power to prevent their progress.”

She was in full professional analysis mode. He’d seen her do this on previous cases that had intersected both of their professional lives. “Agreed.” He planted his hands on his hips and waited for the rest of her analysis. “And?”

“And,” she paused again, held up a hand when he grumbled. “You’re feeling guilty about the way your choices have put your family at risk.” He stalked away, down to the edge of the river. It was too close to what Beth might say. What she’d tried to say as recently as yesterday morning.

His career and his continued dedication to a purpose, to doing the right thing, none of that held any sway with Beth. His heart and soul had been torn apart when she walked out of his life with their son, claiming he was as much a threat to Kyle’s safety as the criminals he was sent to combat.

Here, in this situation, he finally understood what she’d meant. He’d built up a business and developed relationships within the community. But it hadn’t been enough. When he suspected problems or criminal activity, he’d gone above and beyond simply reporting it to the right law enforcement agencies.

He’d seen it as protection, as making the pre-emptive strike. Instead, Tim was dead because Bart had inadvertently dared a drug cartel to try and get away with it.

Maybe not so inadvertently. He pushed a hand through his hair. He hated it when Beth was right.

“Hey,” Hannah said quietly. “I wasn’t finished.”

“You can be. It’s not the first time I’ve heard it.”

“Heard what?”

He shrugged off her touch when her hand rubbed his shoulder, but she didn’t give up. “Talk to me.”

He spun around and the sight of her black eye cut him to the quick all over again. “You’re not the first to remind me how selfish I am. That my adrenaline habit puts others in jeopardy. I’m well aware of the god-awful potential.” He swallowed, uncertain if he could even voice the horrific scenario for her, surprised she wasn’t throwing it in his face first. “If Kyle had been running around out here, the cartel would be all too happy to kill him to make their point. I’ve heard it time and again what a useless excuse I am for a father.”

For long minutes they listened to the river scurrying over the rocks. He prayed the silence would hold, that his brutally honest assessment would prove she didn’t need to give voice to the same problems. He wasn’t sure he could tolerate hearing her voice listing his faults and he didn’t want to analyze why that was.

“Bullshit.”

He swiveled to face her. “Pardon me?”

“You heard me. Now I’m wondering if you’ll listen.”

“You’ve got my attention.”

She cocked a brow. “Let’s hope so, because I only want to say this once. We’ve never discussed your ex-wife, but it’s pretty clear she did a number on you.”

“Now you’re a psychologist.”

“Not exactly, but you sure as hell need one if you’re going to keep bashing yourself like that. The cartel has capitalized onthe anonymity of your business. Shit happens. But neither your business nor your decisions brought any danger to your son.”

“Tim’s dead.”

“And we will figure out why,” she said gently. “Give yourself a little credit, Bart. You took measures to keep Kyle safe, to keep him away from this until we sort it out.”

“Yeah. But I shouldn’t have to do that. What father creates an unsafe situation for his kid?”

Her soft hand caressed his arm and she tugged on his hand until he sat next to her there on the bank. “Which is better, the dad who teaches his son about doing the right thing or the dad who teaches his son to ignore life’s wrongs?”

“A dad is supposed toprotect.Provide. Every time I offer up intel to your agency or another, I put him at risk.”

“Again, I call bullshit.” She sighed. “It would be nice if a dad would listen,” she muttered.

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