Page 11 of In Too Deep

I enter the kitchen and run into Pam, who appears to have taken something to calm her nerves. She’s nearly incoherent, and I decide to keep our exchange a short one—hurriedly making my way to the living room. I’m filled with dread by the time I reach Sarah, anticipating her to be my hardest goodbye. She just lost her husband, the love of her life, her best friend, the father of her children. Her life will never be what it once was, and I can’t even begin to imagine how heartbreaking that must be. Though I saw the toll it took on my sister. Despite all that, she still greets me with a genuine smile and wraps her arms around me.

Lawrence is standing next to Sarah by the time I pull out of her embrace, and I hesitate as he eyes me expectantly. Unsure how to act or what to say, I lift my hand to offer him a quick wave goodbye before jetting for the front door. When I step outside, I stumble upon Robbie having what appears to be an intense conversation with his soon-to-be ex-wife on the stoop of the small concrete porch. He stands to let me by, and I’m surprised when he yanks me in for a quick hug after I make it down the steps. He releases me, and I tell him to let me know if he needs anything while his wife shoots daggers at me before I hustle to my car.

My Honda comes into view, and I let out a long breath. The heaviness in my chest instantly feels a little lighter as I drag in a greedy dose of the night air. But any relief I’m feeling quickly fades when I hear someone’s footsteps coming up behind me as I reach my car.

“You weren’t going to leave without saying goodbye, were you?”

My body tenses at the sound of Lawrence’s deep voice, my stomach fluttering when I turn to see him standing a couple feet away with a grin on his face. His white teeth practically sparkle under the light of the streetlamp. His new, flawless smile is nice, but I miss the old one with the front tooth that had the tiny chip in it from a fight he’d been in as a kid. He was always so self-conscious about it, but for me, it was just another thing about him that I found endearing.

“I did. Inside. Remember?”

He shakes his head as his steps resume, the distance between us getting smaller by the second. “We both know that wasn’t a proper goodbye.”

My heart begins to race, and I pray he doesn’t mean what I think he does. “We do?”

He continues to inch toward me, licking then smacking his lips. “There was a time when we never would’ve parted ways without a hug.”

“That was a long time ago.” My voice is shaky and breathless, and I mentally scold myself, not wanting him to know how nervous he’s making me.

He smirks as he comes to a stop, leaving only a sliver of space between us. “True, but that just means it’s well overdue.”

Before I can protest, he pulls me into his arms, wrapping them tightly around me. I’m reluctant to return his embrace at first, but before long, I melt into him. His hug feels like the comforts of home after an extended vacation, his familiar fresh scent intoxicating. Our hug has lasted longer than necessary or appropriate by the time he breaks away, and the aching feeling from the loss of his touch settles over me.

“God…it was so good to see you, KitKat.” He’s still standing too close for comfort, making it impossible to catch my breath as I nod. “I guess I’ll see you again in a couple days.”

The blood drains from my face as my stomach drops. I’m not sure I can handle seeing him again so soon. It’s too confusing, and next time, Spencer will be with me. I don’t know that I’ll be able to conceal my feelings for Lawrence.

I give him a tight smile, hoping he can’t see the panic on my face. “Yep. I’ll see you later.”

Just when I think he’s going to let me go, he tugs me back into his arms. “I need one more for the road.”

* * *

My head reels as I drive out of the neighborhood, and I decide to swing into the Trading Post. I spent many hot, summer days walking to this tiny convenience store when I was a kid, and a part of me is desperate to cling to that time in my life right now. The bell above the door chimes as I walk inside, and I feel transported back in time. Not much has changed, allowing me to find what I’m looking for quickly. With a bag of Bugles, chewy sprees, and a blue Powerade in hand, I head to the counter to pay for my goodies. The cashier eyes my selections with amusement as he rings me up. He probably thinks I have the munchies or something, but I don’t care. I’m starving and exhausted. I’ll be devouring everything on my way home so I can go straight to bed. As the cashier hands me my change, I see someone standing next to my car, and my heart stops.

My movements are slow and unsure as I leave the store, approaching my car with caution. “Lawrence?”

“You don’t have a KitKat in that bag by any chance, do you?” He smirks. “You know I have a thing for KitKats, and I’m hoping you’ll let me break off a piece.”

My cheeks blush at his comment, and I shake my head. “Nope, sorry. What are you doing here?” My nervous energy causes my tone to sound more abrupt than I intended.

He shrugs. “I hated watching you drive away back there, and I wished we could spend some more time together. Then I saw your car parked at the store, and I figured my prayers were being answered.”

“What?” I breathe, my brow knitting.

He takes my bag, examining the contents before meeting my gaze again. “I haven’t seen you eat all day. Let’s go get some real food.”

“You want me to get something to eat with you?”

He shrugs, his lips twisting to the side. “Is that really such a horrible suggestion? I know it’s been a while, but we used to be so close.” My bag of junk food dangles from his fingertips as he offers it back to me. “I’m only suggesting food and conversation.”

“I don’t know…” I shake my head, taking the bag before averting my gaze to the ground. I’m not sure what to make of Lawrence wanting to hang out with me. He’s been all over the place tonight, then he insisted on hugging me goodbye, now this. I’d be lying if I said it wasn’t tempting but going to eat with him alone is inappropriate. Not to mention dangerous for my heart. “It’s late, and I’m pretty tired. I should probably get home.”

“Please, KitKat.” He places his hands on my shoulders, sending a jolt of electricity through my body as my eyes shoot up to meet his. “If you don’t come with me, I’ll be forced to go home alone and eat a disgusting frozen dinner.” He gives me the saddest and sexiest puppy-eyed expression I’ve ever seen, melting away any resolve I had.

“Just a quick bite to eat?”

A smile spreads across his face as he nods, a mixture of relief and sorrow washing over me as his arms drop back to his sides. “If memory serves, you love pancakes. IHOP is still open.”

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