Page 61 of Forcing Fate

My heart pounded in my chest.

It was now or never.

The sun was just touching the horizon, and I didn’t have much time. I rushed to my room. Once inside, I changed into my gray gown, still the nicest one I had. I secured my coin purse around my waist, then slipped out the door. Hurrying through the hallway, I darted down the stairs and past the dorm guards before my courage failed me.

I eyed the setting sun as I made my way across the school grounds toward the dwindling crowd of women at the barracks’ gate. My heart raced, and I swallowed against the lump in my throat as I melded into the mass. Some noted me and took a step back, eyeing me with wary glares. I ignored them and lifted my chin, heading to the guards.

They were as firm as ever, but a group of soldiers in the barracks called across to the women. They had fresh, youthful faces, ones that hadn’t seen training yet. Maybe they thought they would get lucky with some girl on the school grounds. Though, if Master Elenor or Master Niehm had anything to say about it, the women’s dorms would be locked down tight tonight.

Recruitment Day was notorious for the young women trying to sneak out. Inevitably, some girls managed to sneak past the Masters and attempted to meet up with some boy they saw join the ranks.

I pressed forward, and one guard who recognized me from my assignments frowned when he spotted me.

“Miss Avyanna,” he greeted.

Women crowded behind me. Whether they were curious as to why I was there, or if they pushed closer to inspect the young soldiers, I wasn’t sure. One or two younger men studied me with expressions I didn’t want to think too long about. When I noticed their stares, my skin crawled with the glimmer of hunger in their gaze.

“Good evening.” I never caught the guard’s name and sorely regretted it now. “I seek entry to the barracks.” I was proud of my voice for not trembling.

“You have orders?” he asked, glancing at the crowd.

Women murmured behind me, and I held my head high. “No, sir. I’m here for Recruitment Day.”

Something dangerous flashed across his face. “So are they.” He waved his hand at the throng.

“They’re not here for recruitment,” I stated. My body felt like it didn’t belong to me, as if I watched this scene play out from someone else’s eyes. There was no turning back after this.

His dark brows met in a disturbed frown. “I don’t follow, miss.”

Clearly, I had to spell it out. “I am here to join the ranks, soldier.”

The women gasped and broke out in renewed chatter. The soldiers murmured and shifted nervously. Some of the younger recruits looked at the older ones for assurance that this wasn’t really happening.

“I—You’re–” He closed his mouth, aware that he sounded like a fool. “Someone fetch Sergeant Willhelm!” he barked, glaring at the soldiers till one shot off into the busy mill of men crowding the gate.

Obviously, the guard wasn’t sure what to make of me. I didn’t quite know what to make of my actions, either. This simply was not done. There was no record of any woman ever joining the army.

I was the first female to be refused by a dragonling. The only First Chosen to receive a second chance and the only First Chosen to be refused twice. I might as well carve the way and be the first female soldier, too.

“Make way!” The men shifted, parting to reveal a glowering Willhelm. His dark peppered hair was tousled, and he glanced over the gathered crowd with disgust. “Miss Avyanna?”

“Greetings, Willhelm.”

“Begging your pardon, but there seems to be confusion as to why you’re here. Care to clarify?” he asked. His tone was not harsh, but it was firm. He frowned at me, but seemed more puzzled than angry.

“I’ve come to join the ranks,” I repeated.

The women erupted into nervous chatter once again.

Willhelm blinked slowly, his eyes boring into mine as he processed that. He straightened and looked down at me from his full height. “You came to be a soldier?”

I wondered if he asked that to buy himself time, or if he honestly needed me to repeat it. Surely, of all the men present, Willhelm would understand me well enough to accept me.

I didn’t trust my voice, but gave him a firm nod.

His fists clenched at his side as he took a deep, steadying breath. “Well, let’s go then,” he said. He waited for me to cross the gate and take my place at his side before walking off.

The men followed us, more curious about the girl on their grounds than the girls that were forbidden to them. When the cat-calls began, I felt my first real ping of fear.

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