Page 69 of Dr. Brandt

“May I guide you to your stateroom?” a woman asked behind me.

“I’m looking for my friend, Cameron Brandt?” I said when I turned back to find a beautiful young lady.

She nodded. “Dr. Brandt is on the upper deck. Follow me, and I’ll take you to him.”

I followed the woman until we reached the door that led to the outside deck of the ship, and she opened it for me.

“Thank you,” I softly said.

The door opened and closed during a loud grumble of thunder, so Cam had no idea I was standing out here. He leaned against the railing on his forearms, his hands clasped together, as the rain fell into the choppy gray water below. He had one foot propped up on the bottom rail, but his attention seemed to be focused on his hands.

He was so unbelievably handsome, and I knew what I was about to do.

Skydiving in this weather would’ve probably been safer than trusting this man with my heart again, but here I stood. I felt years of heartache and grief fall off me like scales when I allowed myself to open my heart again to the tall, dark, and handsome man resting against this boat’s rail.

Everything inside of me told me this was a good thing. This is why fate brought this man back into my life. I needed him more than I would’ve ever allowed myself to admit.

And, somehow, I wasn’t scared.

Chapter Twenty-Nine

Cam

I loved the rain; it reminded me of the trips my parents and I took to Europe. My father always had the most exciting plans for us when we arrived, and then it seemed to rain the entire time we were there.

Not even money could ensure that my father’s plans didn’t fall through, and he had more money than he or generations to come could spend in their lifetimes. Even so, the rain forced a change in our plans every time.

My father never allowed the weather to ruin his mood, though. Instead, he found a way to do something entertaining, even if it was playing cards around the kitchen table as a family. And we loved it because even though daily life seemed to keep us busy and apart, little things brought us back together.

Even though my father raised me not to depend on money for happiness but to appreciate the freedom it gave, I somehow wound up doing the opposite. I’d somehow lost myself along the way, and, as Jim said earlier, I’d started to believe everything was owed to my spoiled ass.

What this boiled down to was that I always assumed I would inevitably get what I wanted because, so far, I had. I’d never met any resistance in my rise to success. Granted, it took hard work to get where I was.

Nothing had been handed to me, but I’d also stomped on people without realizing it to get there. I’d had the perfect girlfriend—total wife material—and I’d walked away because what I wanted was more important. Now that fate had brought us back together, I’d just assumed that it’d be water under the bridge and my big, heartfelt declaration of love would be enough to get what I wanted. I was wrong.

I knew I’d been selfish with Jessa, and I always felt bad about it, but I understood now that saying sorry and expecting things to work out just because I wanted them to wasn’t how the world worked.

I was a piece of shit who’d walked away from a treasure, and I didn’t deserve that woman one bit.

I wanted to believe that fate brought Jessa and me together again so I could make everything right and be a father to my son, but why did I think a chance at a family was owed to me?

All I could do was look out at the rain and wonder how to make the best of a bad situation like my father used to. How did people get through stuff like this and come out happy on the other side?

Maybe I needed to let it all rest. Let it go, and deal with the decision I made sixteen years ago. That led me to become an accomplished pediatric neurosurgeon, and I couldn’t have any regrets about it. I made my choice a long time ago, and it came with consequences.

Fuck, I messed this shit up! I thought, standing up straight from where I’d leaned against the railing, wishing I had the courage to rejoin everyone for lunch just to be near Jessa again.

“Cam?”

My head snapped to my left, and I lost myself in her crystal blue eyes.

“Hey, Jess,” I said, and I could hear the sadness in my voice.

Fantastic, Cam, be a little bitch because that’s attractive, I thought, hearing how pathetic I sounded.

“Am I not Jessa to you anymore?”

Where was this coming from?

---