Page 34 of Our Ruined Beginnings

Huffing a sigh, I push down the rage that burns through me. So much anger, all tied up in a ball that weighs me down like lead. I think I prefer it to the grief. It’s the only way I can handle the hurt.

When the door opens again and Evan walks through, the fire I’ve tried to dim roars bright, bursting through me. “Where the fuck have you been?!” I bristle, pushing away from the bed and standing from my chair. “They’ve been here for how long, and you finally show your facenow?”

“I just wanted to check in,” he says, his eyes flicking between me and Harper. Something swims in the depths, but I can’t read it. Sorrow, I’m sure. Anger, even? But he has no right to that emotion. Not tonight.

“A bit too fucking late. What the hell happened?!”

“I don’t—”

Shaking my head, I stalk toward him. At six foot, Evan is tall, but I’m taller. I easily shadow him with the extra inches, my hands clenched into fists.

“What. Happened. Dickens?” He looks stricken now, his eyes flicking between mine and Harper, but I need to know how the hell we went from celebrating her graduation to the three people who mean the world to me disappearing and bringing the worst news back with them.

“I need to tell you something.”

“It better be the answer to my question.” I’m not in the mood for thoughts and fucking feelings. I need facts. Not knowing is driving me crazy.

“Mad—”

A light cough comes from the bed behind me, and my head snaps to the sound. My shoulders deflate, relief washing over me in waves as Harper finally opens her eyes. She blinks a few times, darting her gaze over the room before she finds me, her brow creasing in worry. “What’s going on?”

I rush over, grab the pitcher of water from the table, and pour her a couple fingers’ worth before pressing the cup gently to her lips.

“Hey, Lily.” Whether it’s the soft tone of my voice or the way my lips turn down, her eyes drop, and her hands shake as she takes in the wires feeding into her there. “It’s okay. You’re in the hospital. What do you remember?”

Her mouth opens and closes, her neck craning to find Evan over my shoulder. “The party, we were at Shannon’s…” I nod, confirming her words, and she slowly continues. “But I don’t know. I had some drinks, we were having fun, but then it all turns foggy…”

“There was an accident.”

Her eyes grow wide with panic. “An accident? What happened?” She darts her gaze around the room again, trying to sit up, but she winces and is forced to lie back again. “Where’s Caleb?”

“Lily…” The use of her nickname doesn’t soothe her. If anything, it alerts her to the impending bad news.

“Where is he? Why isn’t he here?” she asks, her words frantic. “He should be here,” Harper continues, working herself up like she knows intrinsically what’s happened. “He would be here. He wouldn’t leave me.” She grabs my hand, tugging me closer to her. “Where is he?”

My mouth gapes, but before I can give her the answer she seeks—the one I’m sure she already fears—the lump in my throat grows, choking me. “Madden?”

I shake my head. “Harper, he’s—”

“There was a car crash.” My head snaps toward Evan, my eyes narrowing on him. “Caleb took the worst of it.”

I shove him into the wall, my forearm pressing against this throat. “You don’t get to be the one to tell her that. Not when you’re the reason we’re all here.” If he won’t give me the details, then I’ll put two and two together myself.

“I wasn’t—” He wheezes when I press harder, his eyes widening. Harper pleads behind me, telling me to stop, but I’m not sure I can. My body trembles, and the urge to snap his neck grows stronger. “It wa-snt—” He grabs my arm, his nails digging into my skin as he drags me away slightly. “I wasn’t driving, Madden,” he gasps out. I loosen my arm, not dropping it completely because we’re finally getting somewhere.

“It was your car…”

I didn’t want to believe my best friend would drive drunk, but when he didn’t turn up at the hospital straight away, it was the answer that made the most sense, especially since he was the only one who drove to the party tonight.

“I know,” he sighs, his eyes dipping. “But I wasn’t driving…”

Brow furrowed, I stumble back a few steps, shaking my head.

There’s no way.

Of course he was driving.

He had to be driving.

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