Page 25 of Mid-Thirties Slightly Hot Mess Female Seeking Billionaire

"But you are hot." Isabel nods toward my chest. "Men will see that."

"They will think I’m hotter than I am. They will probably think I am Margot Robbie Barbie hot. I’m not Barbie hot and I’m not peroxiding my hair."

"Fine." Ella rolls her eyes. "What about, ‘Young single female’?"

"But what if they think I’myoungyoung. Like early twenties?"

"Okay. What about middle age?"

"No way. Mid-thirties is fine." I hiccup and then giggle. "I’m mid-thirties. Actually, I’m more early thirties, but let’s say mid-thirties because I don’t want them to think I’m super young because I’m not thirty or thirty-one."

"Okay, so mid-thirties, single female."

"Yeah, but I don’t want them thinking I’m a normal female and then being like, ‘Oh my gosh, she’s a drama queen when they get to know me.’"

"I got it," Isabel shouts as an idea comes to her. "What about, ‘Mid-thirties, slightly hot mess female’?"

"That makes me sound crazy. But it’s also true." I giggle. "I am a little bit of a hot mess. So okay, that works."

"Yay!" Isabel pumps her fist in the air. "‘Mid-thirties, slightly hot mess female seeking billionaire.’"

"Shouldn’t I say millionaire?" I wrinkle my nose,

"No. Why settle for a millionaire when you can have a billionaire?"

"True. I should set my sights high." I raise my glass and then take another sip of my drink. I know I should stop, but I don’t want to. "Are we drunk?"

"Most probably. And I love this about us." Ella taps her fingers against the table.

"I love this about us, as well. Though, I do think that we’re being goofy."

"What’s wrong with being goofy?" Isabel sings and starts moving her hands in the air. "Why don’t you write a song about that, Sarah?"

"Okay. We’re goofy. We’re funny. We’re all a little slutty," I sing and bite down on my lip.

"I thought you didn’t like the word slutty?"

"Okay, fine. We’re goofy. We’re funny. We’re all a little…" I pause.

"We’re all a little what?" Isabel asks.

"Pretty?" Ella offers.

"Yeah, we’re pretty, but that’s not a fun enough song." I shake my head.

"We’re a little dainty?" Isabel asks.

"Boring." I shake my head. "We’re goofy. We’re funny. We’re all a little kinky," I say, and they both start clapping.

"I like. Are you going to put that in your ad?" Isabel’s eyes are bright.

"Number one, I’m not actually writing an ad, and no way would I put that I’m kinky. Or maybe I would," I say, laughing. "If it was just for fun."

"You would get some really crazy men."

"I already get pretty crazy men."

"Okay, let’s write a full ad."

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