Page 41 of You Are Not Me

“Yeah, let’s get this over with.” I led him inside, glad that Dad had vacuumed that morning, and Mom had cleaned up the pile of old manuscripts she’d had by the sofa for days.

The sun filtered into the kitchen from the back windows. I offered Daniel a drink as he took a seat on one of the stools by the kitchen counter.

I poured myself some water and drank half of it, the silence in the room sliding under my skin. Harry got up and came over to wuffle around Daniel’s legs.

“Who’s this?” He bent to scratch Harry’s ears.

“Harry. He’s been around most of my life.”

“He’s sweet.”

That word again. At least it was aimed at my dog and not me. “I guess I should call Jeremy, huh?”

Daniel shrugged. “There’s no rush, but you’ll feel better when it’s done.”

I hoped he was right. Daniel sat at the kitchen counter petting Harry as I punched in the number I’d written on the mutilated paper napkin. He smiled at me reassuringly when I whispered, “It’s ringing.”

Tugging the phone cord, I sat on the stool across from him. Harry trotted over to my feet, looking up at me hopefully.

“I don’t have any food for you,” I told him. My voice shook. Harry abandoned us for his dog bed again.

Daniel reached his hand over the counter, and I took his fingers, clenching them to keep my nerves in check. I was just getting ready to hang up when Jeremy answered, his voice sounding ragged.

“Hey, um, this is Peter. From last night.”

“Oh, hey.” He sounded confused. “Did I give you my number?”

“No. I got it from…” Daniel shook his head, and I cleared my throat. “Never mind. I wanted to—” I broke off and Daniel lifted his eyebrows encouragingly, squeezing my fingers again. Electricity buzzed where we touched.

Closing my eyes, I forged on. “I wanted to ask if you remembered everything that happened last night, because my mind’s full of blank spaces.”

Jeremy coughed and groaned. “Yeah, dude, that sometimes happens with GHB.” He yawned. “Sorry. You woke me up.”

“Oh. I can call back.”

“No, that’s okay. Anyway, I barely gave us any. Just a few drops. You must have like zero tolerance. You were so damn high.”

“Yeah, drugs and me.” My voice cracked. “We’re not a good mix.”

“You seemed like you had fun, though.” His tone took on a teasing edge before asking more seriously, “You okay this morning? I figured Barry would take you home after he dragged you off like you were his own kid or something.”

“Yeah, I’m okay. I just wanted to ask—um, I remember you blowing me.”

“Mmm-hmm.” He sounded pleased with himself. My stomach twisted.

“Well, did I, uh, do anything?”

“Like return the favor? Nope.” He laughed. “But don’t worry about it, man. I prefer to do the blowing.”

“Oh. Um, but you don’t even know me.” Daniel squeezed my fingers gently again. “Aren’t you worried?”

“Should I be? Do you have herpes? HIV?” Anxiety crept into his voice. “Is that why you’re calling me?”

“No! I’m not—I mean—no. Do you?”

“Of course not.”

“Good. Okay.” Adrenaline was cool in my veins, and my insides shook. “But did I do anything else? With anyone else?”

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