Page 29 of The Refusal

“What? Have you ever given him the keys for any reason?” Matt asks.

“No.”

“Has he ever worked on our system?”

“No.”

“Maybe you left some access open when you went there in the past—”

“No. Definitely not.”

His eyes narrow on me. “Logically, that’s what makes the most sense,” Matt says. I know it does—nine times out of ten these things come from human error. Fabian has told me this himself.

“I haven’t been to code with him for a long time. Our first hack happened four weeks ago. I’ve been all over this. So it’s unlikely—”

“You think he’s been hacking into the system?” Jo says. Her brow is wrinkled as she chews on her lip.

“You said he was a college friend. How close are you now?” Matt asks.

And questions pile up like cars on a highway, thick and fast. They’re the same things I’ve asked myself over and over.

“Very close.” I run my hands through my hair again. “I don’t know, Jo, I don’t know what to think. I’m completely thrown. Fabian and I are more like brothers than friends. We’ve rescued each other from scrapes too many times to count.”

“And this is his handwriting?” Jo taps the phone screen again, eyes staring vacantly at the windows opposite.

I nod again.

“Could he have inadvertently got a password from you in the past? Something you left at his place? Even if it was a long time ago? Help he gave you with something?” I don’t mind the fact Matt is pushing this; I want them to think of all the possible options.

I mull that over for a second, trying to think back, but Jo taps a colored pencil on the table interrupting my train of thought.

“We changed the passwords; it’d have to be recent,” she says.

“I didn’t take anything with me. I worked on his machines,” I say.

“Whywould he be in the system, though?” Jo says. “Do you trust him?”

“Up until now I’d have said I trusted him with my life, and I undoubtedly have on one or two occasions.”

Matt blows out a breath.

“What kind of hacking does he do?” Jo asks, and I tip my chair back to stare at the ceiling. It’s a hole in my knowledge about Fabian. A big fucking hole.

“I don’t know to be honest. He’s more of an information gatherer, I’d say. I wouldn’t peg him as selling a lot of government secrets; he’s more about exposing corruption. He likes to know stuff, particularly about legal cases, big ones with the government or businesses, that kind of thing.”

“Perhaps he’s being blackmailed?” Jo says.

“Doesn’t that only happen in movies?” Matt mumbles. He’s pushed his chair right back from the table and is now sitting with his elbows on his knees, hands wrapped around the back of his neck as he stares at the floor.

The thought had crossed my mind. He wouldn’t want to tell me, thinking I’d offer to help, give him money. “He’s certainly got an alternative lifestyle.”

Matt looks up. “How alternative?”

I shrug. “Drugs and stuff mainly. He experiments with some crazy shit, using his body like a chemistry lab.”

“Jesus. He could be involved in some big narcotics thing.” Matt sits back, pushing his unruly mop back from his face. “This might explain everything that’s been happening recently, the security breach—”

“I don’t really see how a drugs thing—” I start.

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