Page 56 of At My Worst

“Be mine forever, Bianca, because that is what I am asking of you.”

I remove my fingers from her pussy and pull back, releasing my hold on her hand. She slowly turns around, and I place my hands on either side of her head as I stare into the eyes of the woman I need more than I need fucking air.

“Please,” I plead.

The tears in her eyes roll down her face. I lean down, kissing each one of them away.

“Yes,” she whispers.

I smash my lips to hers as she wraps her arms tightly around my waist, pulling me into her. My body melts against her as she shoves her face into my chest.

I am at a loss for words, so I say nothing. She answered, she said yes, and now I will prove to her every minute, every fucking second of every damn day that I will keep my promises, starting right fucking now.

25

Bianca

“@ My Worst”by blackbear

Alexander asked me to stay, and I can’t say no. I am learning that I will probably never be able to tell him no. But the thing is, I don’t want to tell him no. He makes it so hard. Everything about him is fucking intoxicating.

Things have changed again, making my head spin and my knees weak. Talk about a fucking fast-burn romance.

In a short time, Alexander has been put through the wringer with me, the ups and downs of my thoughts and behaviors. I am trying not to take it out on him. I am trying to keep my emotions in check, but it seems sometimes I lose the battle. Sometimes I just can’t fucking help myself, and I make things worse.

It brings self-sabotage to a whole new level. I am good at fucking things up, even when I try to do everything not to. It is like a curse or something.

I don’t say the right things or do the right things. I act before I think, and there are consequences that I have to deal with later.

Alexander has shown me with his actions, not just his words, which mean the world. Words mean nothing, and often, we are not being honest with our words, but our actions don’t lie. Our actions tell the truth.

You can say whatever the fuck you want, but your actions will show your true intentions and show the real feelings inside us.

Alexander’s actions speak loud and clear, and he has no issues continuing to show me. His words warm my entire body, but his actions, his actions fucking hit my heart and, at times, make it hard to breathe.

I walk out my front door and walk towards the tavern. He had to return to prepare a few things for tonight, and I needed to write a little. I am making progress on the new book, and I still don’t know exactly how it will end yet, but I have a feeling I will know soon enough.

“I don’t want to fight. I was just asking if you are okay,” I say, trying to keep my emotions under control.

“You are the one that is fighting. I am not fighting. I said I was fine,” he says in an irritated voice.

I hate it when he talks to me like I am a child.

“You don’t seem okay,” I say, watching him closely.

His body language, the way he looks at me, and his tone tell me the opposite of his words.

Why is it that whenever I try and talk to him, he seems so fucking annoyed? Like talking to me is such a fucking chore?

“That is the way you are seeing it, which is wrong. Listen to what I am saying, Bianca,” he says.

“I am,” I admit.

“No, you’re not, or you would not keep asking me,” he says.

He says he is fine and that we are fine, but I don’t even know what that means anymore.

“Your tone,” I say softly.

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