Page 29 of Behind Amber Eyes

I bite my fingernail as I watch her, unsure if Iwantto know what it says but knowing that Imustknow. “What…what does he want?”

She refolds the paper and sighs, eyes downcast. “He wants you to meet him. Says he wants to explain.” Her gaze turns to me. “Explain what, Amelia?”

I pause. I never told her about that final meeting with him. When she had initially asked, I said that I had a change of heart about the whole thing. I feel bad that I’ve kept it from her, so it’s only fair that I come clean. “Liv, I…I wasn’t totally honest about why I stopped seeing him.”

Her expression is reproachful, but she keeps silent and motions for me to continue.

I hate disappointing Olivia. I should have been honest, but I could barely handle the lies he told me, let alone retelling it to someone else. “I’m so sorry, Liv. It wasn’t because I didn’t trust you or that I didn’twantto tell you. It was just…It was just too hard to repeat. I don’t like to think about it, to be honest.”

Her expression shifts from reproach to worry, and she places a hand over mine. “Amelia, did he hurt you?”

I shake my head, though that’s not necessarily true. However, he didn’t hurt me in the way she’s thinking. “No, Liv, no. It’sjust…he revealed things to me, told me why he knows me, and it’s just too hard to believe. He was playing me the whole time.”

“What do you mean? What did he say?”

I owe this to her. No matter how much I hate talking about it, I need to be truthful. She’s done so much for me. I get comfortable on the bed and regale my last adventure. She listens dutifully, never interrupting, and once I’m done, I can’t read her expression.

She stays silent for a few moments, which only serves to heighten my anxiety, and then she finally asks, “Why do you think it’s a lie?”

Whatever I was expecting, that wasn’t it. I look at her in confusion. “I mean, of course it’s a lie. It sounds absolutely crazy, Liv.”

She bites her lip, eyes on me. “I mean, yeah, it sounds crazy. But…I mean, what do we really know about Elders? Besides what they allow us to, anyway.” She sighs and looks back down at the paper. “Thing is…okay, it sounds crazy, but what if itistrue?” When she notices my apprehension, she sighs again. “It just seems like there’s a lot to lose if it’s true, that’s all.” She shrugs and sits back. “Maybe it’s because of this letter, but…honestly, Amelia, he seems genuine. At least on paper. And you know how badly I’ve wanted you to be careful, so I think you should read this and make the choice for yourself.”

I trust Olivia’s opinion more than my own most times, so I reach over for the letter to read it myself.

Amelia,

I know you want nothing to do with me. I fully understand why. I am truly sorry for overwhelming you. I only ask of you one thing: meet me one last time. Allow me the chance to prove myself true.

I will be at the park tomorrow evening.

Whatever you choose, it is fully up to you. I would be forever grateful for the simple chance to meet one last time, but will leave you be if you choose not to come, or choose to deny me.

Arman

Actions speak louder than words, I remind myself as I read through the letter again. It’s easy for him to say he’ll leave me be, but will he?

Granted, our final meeting was over a month ago and he’s not tried to force contact on me once.

Is there a chance his story is…true? Olivia seems to think so. I can’t even bring myself to go that far, but I’m not sure if it’s due to true disbelief or self-preservation. How can she get me to change my views so easily? How canhe?

If his story is true…my whole world would be turned upside down. Every fear I had surrounding my life here, while meeting with Arman, would come true, and then some. There would be no going back. This isn’t simply a choice of to love or not to love – it’s a choice of treason.

It’s just one meeting. One meeting to give him his chance, and then he’ll leave me alone for good.

I refuse to consider the alternative.

I look back up to Olivia, mind made up. “This is the last time.”

She grabs my hand and nods slowly. “Last time. I’m not letting you go alone, though. I’ll come, just like before. If you’re not back within the hour, I’ll come get you.”

I shake my head. “You’re not putting yourself in danger again, Liv. You can come, but if I don’t come back then just alert the officials on guard. Tell them you had nothing to do with it, that I had a mental break or something.”

She looks as though she’s going to argue, but ultimately agrees. When I initially told Olivia that I wasn’t seeing Arman anymore, I had her give me her amulet so that I could keep an eye on them myself. I’m now grateful for doing so, as I go to my closet to retrieve the necklaces.

This is the last time.

Chapter 16

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