Page 52 of The Final Deal

Adrian’s eyes are closed, but one cracks open and fixes on us. “Fuck you, I ain’t partyin’ withy’allever again.”

“Have we finally out-partied the notorious Adrian Ramos?” I ask.

He settles down further into his chair with his arms crossed like he’s displeased, but the twist of his lips rats him out. “So it seems.”

The beam on my face widens as I scootch closer into Zak’s side. He squeezes me a little tighter, and the upward curl of Dree’s lips as he closes his eyes again makes warmth explode in my chest.

My heart—and my pussy—could not be any fuller.

An entire tray of food drops to the floor, startling everyone as glass shatters, silverware clatters over tile, and someone yells out an expletive. The server grumbles as she starts cleaning up with the help of a couple others, and as she bends over, there’s a dark figure sitting at a table behind her.

I sober up pretty quickly at the sight of the black cowboy hat.

The devil tips his hat in my direction. His signature glinting grin appears underneath the shadows.

I squeeze Zak’s thigh. “Let’s go ahead and git.”

If the devil’s showing his face, it sure as shit isn’t going to be in front of the twins.

I don’t know why I drove to the church instead of the bridge. At the house, I kissed the twins, said I had to run a couple of errands, blinked, and now I’m approaching the prayer garden and the statue of Our Lady of Guadalupe overlooking it.

Maybe I’m still hung the fuck over.

Standing in front of Mary, I smile at the bright, slightly faded colors adorning her statue. She stands out among the dead grass and trees, especially with all the flowers at her feet. The bursting sun rays surrounding her seem like a mockery to the bright sun beating down on her, like she’s brighter than the Texas sun on any given day and ain’t afraid to show it.

I remember Adrian kissing me for the first time in front of her.

The thought of it now wrinkles my nose to keep the stinging away from my eyes. I always thought he was so overwhelmed with bottled-up grief that he didn’t know how to express it, that that kiss manifested from misplaced emotion and I was the one there to receive it.

I wish I didn’t ignore how obvious it was. The way he held me after the concert when we first signed with our record label; all the anger and how silent he became after Zak asked me out; the way he kissed me here in the garden; the way he didn’t just fuck me the night that screwed everything up.

I might be a whore for fucking them both last night, but it was necessary. They need to figure out how to handle me between the both of them, or else history might repeat itself.

The building tears sting my eyes.

I don’t want to lose either of them.

Something brushes my shoulder and I jump away. Spinning around, Father Tomas looks at me with concern.

“Sorry, didn’t mean to scare you,” he apologizes. “You okay?”

I swallow thickly and swipe away the tear that escaped, but my voice gets lost somewhere in all the thoughts swirling in myhead. My lips part as I try to find the words to say, though nothing comes out. Father Tomas squeezes my shoulder, and the words squeeze out of me, too. “Do you think some people are predestined to belong to the devil?”

Father frowns and tilts his head curiously. “No, not at all. It’s the total opposite: everyone is predestined to be God’s. But we have free will and can choose otherwise if we want.” He studies me. “What makes you think you’re predestined for hell?”

My head shakes, searching to focus on anything that isn’t a man of God so I can stop feeling so fucking guilty.

“Do you need to make your confession?”

The thought of it all—poof!—suddenly going away with one admission is so enticing that my mouth dries.

No more devil. No more deals. No more…

The rock in my throat returns and threatens to choke me, daring me to say those words despite my intentions.

I’ve been selfish this entire time; what’s stopping me now from confessing and letting it all disappear from my shoulders like nothing?

Movement in the thicket of mesquite and huisache behind the cemetery catches my attention, where a familiar shadow lingers.

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