Page 71 of The Chase

"The crew noticed the first time they stayed over," Nova counters. "We've known for months."

"I can only tell you what makes sense to me... I think my mind is trying to put it all together when I'm asleep."

Nova nods.

I ignore the butterflies that scatter in my chest. “I feel like someone is on top of me, like pushing me down, so much so, that I can't breathe."

Even when I think about it, I can't breathe.

Nova reaches out to me, taking my hand as I continue. "They aren't dreams, but I don't understand when it could have happened." My breath hitches.

"Do you feel it happened recently or are they old memories?"

"I don't know, that's the issue. But it feels like it wasn't that long ago..."

"When did they start?"

"I can't even pinpoint that. They became more pronounced when I met Austin, and I don't know what that means either."

"You feel safe with him so maybe your mind is ready to analyze what's happened to you."

I sigh. "I had a flashback when Harry was at Dexter's."

"What was it?" She continues drinking her hot chocolate as she holds my hand, leaning forward like we are sharing a secret.

"The drink... Harry was plying me with drinks..."

"When?"

"I've had many drinks with Harry, but this feels like it was before my date with Zac."

"That happened ages ago."

"I know..." I sense Nova getting as frustrated as me when it comes to piecing it all together.

"How did the date go with Zac?"

When it comes to dates, my girls don't ask unless I tell them. They all know that I'm a closed book when it comes to men, except Austin, who likes to flaunt it. "I don't remember much really, Harry and his drinks..."

"Mia..." She sets her drink down on the table and edges closer. "Were you spiked?"

I shake my head. "Harry wouldn't..." I falter. I don’t even know anymore…the old Harry would never do such a thing. But this new Harry…

"But you don't remember the evening..."

"I can't... it can't... No."

Surely, I'd know if someone had spiked my drink…

"How did the date end?"

I shake my head. "I don't want to talk about it, Nova."

I don't recall how it ended, and that little bit of information has sweat pinging on my hands. I can't tell them this. They will make me do something about it and I know I won't be believed. Why would the cops believe me when they’ve always believed them?

Panic reaches into my chest.

Have I been…raped?

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