Page 87 of Thick & Thin

It wasn’t a good idea to be close to her. No matter how badly I longed to be close to her. To be a breath on her lips. A strand of hair touching her shoulder softly. I couldn’t give in. I would do anything for Jenny. Even keep my emotions locked away. It wasn’t like I hadn’t done that before with her. Things were good where they were. We needed to stay away from each other and keep feelings out of it. No matter how deep mine ran for her.

I showered, washing away the hospital, and the hot water eased my tense shoulder muscles. The past few weeks had been hell. First, I buried my father, and now, my mom was having heart issues. I wouldn’t lose her. She was sick with a broken heart, literally, but I would do all I could to make sure she stuck around for many years.

After my shower, I dressed and sat on the couch, thinking maybe a little bit of TV would calm my wrecked nerves, but nothing I did soothed me. I knew what I needed, but I wasn’t ready to fully admit it to myself.

Jenny.

I needed to thank her.

She might have crushed me three years before, but if it hadn’t been for her, my mother would no longer be with us. If only for that reason, I would forgive her long enough to thank her.

Stopping by the E-Z Mart, which I was surprised was still open, I grabbed a bag of gummy bears from the aisle, paid for them along with a Mountain Dew, which used to be Jenny’s favorite, and then I left and started toward her place. If I was going to thank her properly, gummy bears and Mountain Dew were needed. It didn’t make sense to anyone else, but it didn’t need to. It was our way, and she would understand I was sorry without me having to say it.

The drive to the Michaels’ house was one I was familiar with. Memories of the way Jenny and I used to be flashed through my mind, and I felt my stomach go hollow. Her laughter. Her smile. The way she used to punch my shoulder playfully when I said something funny.

Then another memory hit me like ton of concrete. The night in her dad’s truck. The way she had climbed on top of me and rode me like she couldn’t get enough. The way her mouth fell open when her orgasm took ahold of her. The sounds she made. The way her teeth dug into her bottom lip when she didn’t think she could take it anymore.

It was such a sweet memory.

One had hoped I could lose, but secretly held onto for dear life.

The porch lights were off and so were the rest of the lights. I would have thought no one was home if it weren’t for the single light on at the back of the house. Jenny’s room.

The porch light came on when I slammed my truck door, and I was almost up the steps when the front door opened.

“How is she?” she asked in a rush.

I felt like shit for not calling her sooner to let her know Mom was going to be okay, but I had been so busy trying to work up the nerve to go see her.

“She’s still with us. Thanks to you.”

Her eyes moved over my body, landing on the bag in my hand. We had done this a million times in our lives. She knew what was in the bag and understood instantly what was happening.

“You can keep that. No need to thank me. I was just doing what any other human being would do.”

I shook my head. “No. You saved her life, Jenny. The EMT said so. If it wasn’t for you, she would have been long gone before they got there. I can’t …”

“Just stop. I love your momma. She’s like the mom I never had, and you know that. Don’t thank me for this. I would do anything for that woman.”

I nodded.

I knew she was telling the truth.

Jenny was a lot of things, but I knew she loved my family.

I tossed the bag at her, and she caught it against her chest.

“Josh, just …”

“Keep the damn gummy bears, okay?”

I grinned despite myself.

It was then I noticed how she was standing. Her shoulders back, and if I wasn’t mistaken, she was sucking her stomach in.

Was she trying to hide herself from me?

Was she covering her weight gain like it was a bad thing?