Page 71 of Thick & Thin

“How badly did you cut it?”

He didn’t have time to answer before Lilly spoke up, startling us. “Oh my God, babe. What happened?”

And just like that, Devin was being babied like he wasn’t a grown-ass man.

He let her fuss over him, holding his hand out while she checked the cut and determined he needed stitches.

I chuckled to myself as I slammed the hood of my car shut. Devin had once wrapped his arm in duct tape instead of going to the hospital after accidentally shooting a nail in it with a nail gun. Now, he was being fussed over by the woman he loved and rushed to the hospital over something I was sure would only require a few stitches. Things had sure changed.

I tinkered around the garage in the backyard for a bit, killing time, before I went inside and showered to get ready for the funeral.

I wore a black dress that Lilly brought over for me. It wasn’t her size, which meant she had bought it for me, but I had learned early on not to bitch when she bought us things. It was easier to let her. Plus, I think it hurt her feelings when I refused things.

Instead of a pair of fancy heels, I wore a pair of black sandals, also new. It didn’t look bad, and it wasn’t like anyone was going to be looking at my feet. Hopefully, no one looked at me at all.

I dressed Caleb in a black Polo shirt and a nice pair of khakis, but he refused to leave the house in anything but his Spiderman shoes. He was a toddler. If anyone had anything to say about what my kid was wearing, they could kiss my entire ass, and these days, there was a lot back there.

Dad was waiting in the living room playing with Caleb when I came out of my room. He grinned and whistled when he saw me.

“Who the hell are you, and what did you do with my Jenny?” he joked.

“What? Would you prefer I wear my jeans and a T-shirt? Or is that too disrespectful for you?”

He chuckled and picked up Caleb while I grabbed my keys from the table. He followed me and put Caleb in his car seat before climbing in the passenger side of my car.

The graveyard wasn’t far, but we had left late enough that I had to park down the street since the small church parking lot was full. That was what I was aiming for. Devin and Lilly were waiting for us, both kids were dressed nicely and smiling when they saw me, and Daddy headed their way.

“Look how handsome you are, Caleb,” Lilly cooed, picking my son up and carrying him on her hip.

She smiled at me, and I knew what her game was. If she had both boys with her, maybe people wouldn’t know which was Caleb and which was Jacob. It was smart, and I was grateful for her.

We walked as a family into the little church, and when my family went toward the front to view Mr. Black, I stayed in back tucked away with Caleb hoping to disappear. Josh was nowhere to be seen, but I didn’t breathe again until we were leaving the church and walking over to the graveyard next to the church where Mr. Black would be laid to rest.

Everyone gathered around the dark green tent above the hole in the ground, I stayed behind everyone, hoping to hide behind Dad and Devin’s height. Caleb smiled at me from Lilly’s shoulder, and his smile somehow sent a wave of calm over me. Things would be okay. Funerals didn’t last long, and we would be back in my car and headed home in no time.

As soon as we reached the gathering, the double doors of the church opened, and the pallbearers came out, carrying a sleek black casket. The family walked behind them, and my eyes went straight to Josh, who was walking beside Mrs. Black with his hand resting on her back for support. Her eyes were red and puffy, and she wiped at her nose with a tissue that seemed to be falling apart. Genie and her husband, Jimmy, were directly behind them, and Genie followed her mom’s lead, wiping her tears from her splotchy face.

My heart broke for him, and I felt tears rush to my eyes, as well. The Blacks were my family. Even though Josh wasn’t home, I still went over and spent time with them, and when Caleb was born, Mr. and Mrs. Black had come to the hospital to see me and bring him a teddy bear. I had pictures of them holding Caleb with happy smiles on their faces as if he were their own grandson. The sickest part was, he was exactly that.

Still, without knowing that fact, they had taken us in and continued to treat me like part of the family. Caleb had become their world, alongside Genie’s twin girls, Grace and Hope, and they kept him when Lilly couldn’t, and I had to work. There were days when I would show up to pick him up to find him on the farm with Mr. Black. Some days, he would be inside while Mr. Black fed him his favorite baked goods. They were the perfect grandparents, and I was so glad they had become that to Caleb without me having to come clean with my secret. They were my son’s family, even if no one except Lilly and I knew that.

I put my head down and captured an escaped tear with my finger. When I looked up again, my eyes caught Josh’s, and his brows pulled down in an angry expression I hadn’t expected. Sure, he was a total dick at Sprints, but this was different. This was his father’s funeral. Surely, he didn’t think I wouldn’t come and pay my respects … say my goodbyes to the man who had been like a second father to me.

Josh looked handsome in his black suit. Without a hat on, his hair was brushed back, and he had grown a nice beard over the three years he was gone. It wasn’t too thick, and it wrapped around his kissable mouth before blending in with his sideburns. I liked it. More than I would ever admit to anyone.

I turned away, breaking his stare and moving closer to Dad’s back in hopes that Josh would forget I was there once he couldn’t see me anymore.

The funeral didn’t last long, and even from the back of the small crowd, I could hear Mrs. Black’s sobs over the preacher. After we bowed our heads and prayed over the casket, the crowd slowly broke apart, leaving only the close family and friends who were sitting in chairs beneath the green tent over the gravesite.

I took Caleb from Lilly and started to turn away, expecting Dad and the rest of the family to follow, but that didn’t happen. Instead, Dad grabbed my hand and pulled me toward the casket. I pulled back, digging my sandals into the grass, but he didn’t let me fight, and I ended up following him as he walked up to Mrs. Black and the rest of the Black family.

“Paula, I’m so sorry for your loss,” he said, placing a hand on her shoulder.

She reached up and patted his hand and nodded.

“If there’s anything y’all need, please let me know.”

And then he did something I hadn’t expected. He leaned back, put his large hand on my back, and pushed me toward the Black family.

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