Page 37 of Only Hard Problems

“Absolutely,” I agreed. “But I do know the truth, and unlike you, I’m going to actuallydosomething about it.”

Wendell looked at me, and the burgeoning hope on his face made another sharp dagger of regret twist in my gut.

“Oh, why do you even care so much?” Beatrice snapped again. “You’ve been perfectly happy being an only child and the heir to House Zimmer for the last thirty-eight years.”

“Because I could have had a sister,” I said in a soft, tired voice. “I could have had someone to help me, someone to help shoulder the burden of House Zimmer. I could have had someone else to trust.”

I could have had someone else to love.

The thought popped into my mind, and the truth of it sliced straight through my heart. I rubbed my chest, but that didn’t banish the dull, hollow ache.

Once again, Beatrice’s posture cracked. Her shoulders sagged, and she braced an elbow against her desk, as if she needed its solid support to hold herself upright. Lines of pain and regret grooved into her face, making her look every single one of her eighty-some years. “I just did what I thought was best for everyone.”

Her strained, shaky voice added to the ache in my chest.

“I know,” I replied, all the heat and anger gone from my own voice. “But you took my sister away from me, and I don’t know if I’ll ever be able to forgive you for that.”

I ignored Beatrice’s stricken expression, along with Wendell’s, and stalked out of the library.

CHAPTER TWELVE

ZANE

Icouldn’tdealwithany more family drama right now, so I went to my tower library and shut and locked the door behind me.

I stomped around for the better part of a minute, pacing past the piles of books and weapons haphazardly strewn across the tables, but slowly, the rest of my anger drained away, leaving behind an empty, hollow, cracked cavern deep in my chest.

I stopped in front of the mirror I had used to get ready for the solstice celebration. Mussed blond hair, dull blue eyes, dirt and grime streaked across my cheeks, and of course, the black hole in my tailcoat where Silas had shot me with his hand cannon. The Techwaver might not have killed me, but his aim had been truer than he realized, and I didn’t feel like I even had a heart right now. No, right now, all I could feel was the aching loss and brimming bitterness in the place where my heart should be.

Another harsh laugh spewed from my lips, and I spun away from the mirror.

My gaze landed on the brewmaker on a nearby table. I should make myself a cup of tea, cram a few protein bars into my mouth, and get cleaned up. Perhaps even take a quick nap, if I could somehow drift off for a few minutes. Holloway would want me to report to Crownpoint and give him all the details about the Techwave attack as soon as the sun was up.

A tired sigh escaped my lips, but I went over to the table. I fished Jorge’s wristwatch and Asterin’s jewelry box out of my coat pocket and set them aside, then rummaged through the table’s center drawer looking for a pod of blueberry tea. The motions reignited the dull ache in my ribs. Another skinbond injector wouldn’t hurt either—

A presence stirred the air behind me, and the sweet, soft scent of spearmint flooded the tower library. I froze, then slowly straightened up and turned around.

Vesper was here.

She was standing in the middle of my library, a confused look on her face, as if she didn’t know how she had gotten here.

Over the past few weeks, I’d studied countless photos of my sister, so her features were as familiar to me as my own—dark brown hair with a few red highlights, pale skin, and dark blue eyes studded with silver flecks. She was wearing an Arrow uniform of a tactical jacket over a matching shirt, cargo pants, and knee-high boots, all in the sapphsidian blue of House Caldaren.

My lips curled in disgust. Out of all the people in the galaxy, my sister had a truebond with Kyrion bloody Caldaren. I hoped whatever quirk of fate that arranged this vicious irony was having a long, hearty laugh at my expense.

I stepped away from the table. Vesper’s startled gaze flew over to me, and her image flickered just a bit around the edges, like a hologram. We faced off in the middle of my library.

“Astral projection?” I drawled. “My, my, my. You must be a much stronger seer than I realized to do that.” I tilted my head to the side. “Or perhaps Kyrion’s power is fueling your own and driving it to even greater heights. I don’t know much about truebonds.”

“Trust me, this little appearance is as surprising to me as it is to you,” she muttered.

Vesper crossed her arms over her chest and looked me up and down, her gaze lingering on the hole in my coat, the black ring that marked my heart like a macabre bull’s-eye. “Rough night?”

“You could say that.” I crossed my arms over my own chest and leaned my left hip back against the table, mimicking her posture. “There was a minor incident with the Techwave.”

She snorted. “A squad of Black Scarabs rampaging through a Regal ball is a bit more serious than a minor incident.”

“Agree to disagree.”

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