Page 8 of Every Little Thing

She chewed her cheek. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to.”

I slumped. “Ugh, that’s embarrassing. I thought I could lie my way out. Forget I said anything. I don’t do this kind of thing.”

She smiled sweetly at me. “You can totally share things with me, you know. I’m not judgmental.”

“No way. Nuh-uh. Not happening.”

She elbowed me lightly. “Tell.”

“No!”

“Tell?”

“Oh my god, you sound like me. Am I that insufferable?”

She batted her eyelashes at me. I probablywasthat insufferable. I made a mental note to change absolutely nothing about my behavior, and I turned back ahead, hunching my shoulders.

“Sometimes I just wonder what I’m doing with my life,” I said.

“Mm.” She turned her gaze ahead with me, walking slowly. “It’s a lifelong process, I think, figuring it out.”

“Yeah, well… maybe I don’t want to bother. That sounds like a lot of work.”

“I don’t think it has to be. Why not find the things that feel like play?”

“Pfeh.” I kicked at the sidewalk. “I have it all already. I run a cute little bookstore, and the operating costs are low enough and the margins are high enough that I get all the money I need with, like, zero effort, but I don’t really make a lot more money if I put in more effort, so it’s just chill. I go in there when I wantto vibe and hang out with cool books. I eat cheese all the time, I have a bunch of cool friends who hang out with me, and I get to keep up with the gossip. I love gossip. I eat it up.”

“I’ve heard that once or twice about you.”

“I guess I just don’t get the point. Paisley is Paisley. I’m just me. I’m gonna keep on being me. So… going with the windy leads.”

“I don’t think you got the saying quite right.”

“I did.”

She shrugged, looking up at where clouds streaked in thin white ribbons over the brilliant cerulean of the sky. “Springtime is the season of love, isn’t it?”

“Yup. The season for me to love myself.”

“Is there a reason you don’t date?”

I scrunched up my face. The fact that the last thing I’d had going was with Harper, and that was just two instances of accidentally having sex… I didn’t want to think about it. Luckily, I specialized in not thinking. “Nobody’s good enough for me.”

She pouted, putting her hands on her hips, turning to face me. “You know, I’m going to spill what Priscilla said about you.”

Oh, god. I didn’t need that in my life. “Asking Priscilla about me should be banned.”

“She said you seem so… scared.” She dropped her arms, a soft sympathy on her face that I couldn’t deal with right now. Or ever, actually. “Like you’re worriedyou’renot good enough for other people. Like the flippant attitude is—”

“Ugh, I’m going to teach her a lesson.” I spun on my heel. “She’ll see! I’m gonna go talk about her girlfriend until she dies of embarrassment. That will be my revenge.”

“You know,” she said, walking quicker to keep up with me, “it’s okay to have insecurities and worries—”

“Just don’ttellanyone about this conversation,” I said, waving her off as I marched on ahead. “If this gets out as gossip, I’m gonna literally kill everyone in the universe.”

“That’s quite a commitment…”

“I’m a very committed person!”

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