Page 44 of Chase

“You fell off shortly after that,” his familiar voice floats across the room from the doorway where he’s leaning against the wall. I know it’s him, I could recognize his voice anywhere, but I still jump out of my skin. He laughs as he walks over to look at the photograph with me. “Must have been one of the last times we hung out together before things…changed.”

“You mean when you started having sudden urges to suck face with anything in a skirt?” I tease. “You never caught on to why that bothered me so much.”

“What can I say? I was a teenage boy thinking with my dick,” he says with a shrug, his knee now touching mine. “I only realized why it had upset you so much after I kissed you for the first time.”

A silence ensues while we continue staring at the photo of us. I suddenly have no idea what to say to him. I’ve lost all sense of direction.

“If you would prefer me to stay on the couch, I can; I really don’t mind.”

I look up at him and we stare at each other for another moment or two; I don’t even realize the mask is slipping from my face.

“I wonder if you had stayed, things might have been totallydifferent,” I murmur, almost to myself, “ifIwould be different.”

He frowns and begins to pull my wayward hair behind my ear before letting his hand drop to his lap with a small thud. In a moment of vulnerability, I reach up and wrap my arms around his neck, and lean my head over his shoulder. At first, he seems shocked so doesn’t move. However, it doesn’t take long for him to put his arms around the back of me to hold on tightly.

A traitorous sniff escapes me as tears fall silently down my cheeks. He knows I’m crying but he doesn’t say anything, just tightens his grip. I realize I’m now straddling his lap, but this isn’t sexual; this is all emotion, poured into one embrace that’s been long overdue.

I lean back so I can look at his face, probably with mine looking a complete mess, but he smiles before planting a small, chaste kiss on my lips.

“Bed, Izzy,” he whispers. I release a small laugh and unstraddle him before walking back to my side of the bed and climbing in. He gets up after I’ve stopped shuffling between the sheets and walks over to the door.

“Theo?” I call, stopping him in his tracks. He turns and looks at me with gentle concern. “Please stay with me tonight…I promise to keep my hands to myself.”

He smiles, then nods before exiting the room.

Chapter 16

Theo

I sit in the dark contemplating what has just passed between Izzy and me. I had to walk away and get a hold of my emotions and let her fall asleep before I could even think about crawling in next to her warm body. I desperately want to hold her, amongst other things, I’ll admit, but I’m scared she’ll bolt. After she just showed her true self to me, I can’t risk going backward. I knew on the night of that Christmas party, when we shared a bed together and declared our feelings for one another that I was hers for life. No one has ever come close to how I feel about her, and no one ever will. She is hurting so badly, and it is literally messing with my head to not know what has gotten to her over the years.

I took to boxing when I first arrived back in the States, as a means to vent my aggression. At first, it was because I had to leave her, then it was not being able to contact her. Then came the moment I found out she had left home with some other guy. I couldn’t stop picturing her moving on without me and my rage hit new heights. Now, however, it’s seeing her empty eyes and not being able to make her tell me what took all the light from them.

I knock back the brandy in my glass, check my watch to see if enough time has passed so I can safely return to my room, and then make the slow ascent to bed. I open the door and the light shines upon her small body, all curled up in the fetal position. I walk over to her and crouch down to peer into her face, watching her body gently rise and fall with her steady breathing. Even in sleep, she looks troubled, with her brow furrowed and her hands balled tightly into fists. I kiss her gently on the cheek, causing her to mumble something incoherent, and then I leave her be. She’s safe, and right now, that’s all I need to know.

_____

Theo

Pitched screaming wakes me from a dreamless sleep. I feel disorientated for a moment or two before I remember Izzy and the fact that she’s lying beside me. Correction, shewaslying beside me. Now, she’s thrashing around, seemingly pushing away at someone in front of her. Once I make sense of what I’m seeing, I try and grab for her wrists to still her, but she doesn’t stop; if anything, it makes her kick and scream even harder. I shout her name to try and wake her, but she doesn’t hear me beyond the nightmare. In the end, I jump up and hit the lights before grabbing hold of her shoulders and trying to shake her out of it.

“Izzy! It’s ok, it’s Theo, it’s me,” I cry out over and over until eventually, she opens her eyes and begins to transition from sleeping to waking.

Relief washes over me as she begins to take in my face. She’s still panting and covered in perspiration, but at least she’s stopped throwing her arms and legs about. Before long, she calms herself, then covers her mouth with both hands and bursts into tears.

“It was just a dream, baby,” I try to soothe her as I pick herup and hold her in my arms. “It’s ok, nothing’s going to hurt you, I promise.”

“They came for me again,” she cries, “they came!”

“Who came, Izzy?” I ask gently.

“They came, Mum didn’t believe me,” she sobs. “She told them I was troubled after you left, but I wasn’t, I swear I wasn’t.”

“Ok, Izzy, look at me,” I tell her, trying to get her eyes to focus on mine. “Iz, I believe you; you know I do. Just tell me what happened,” I say softly, even if I am terrified of what she’s going to reveal.

“They just kept coming…he was supposed to protect me…he…then…”

“Then what?” I ask through clenched teeth because this doesn’t sound at all good.

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