Page 29 of Chase

“I know that, Will, but think of it as a trial. If you want more sessions, then we can work out some sort of means-tested payment plan.”

Will is doing this himself; he doesn’t want his parents to know. I want to respect that. If it were up to me, I wouldn’t charge anyone, but unfortunately, London rates are expensive, and my office sucks up most of my income. This is the main reason for accepting Nonna’s challenge. Believe me, I would have refused otherwise; I’ve learned to live alone, where it’s safe.

“Ok,” he sighs, still sounding unconvinced by the arrangement. “But if you change your mind, I want you to tell me as soon as possible,” he says with such a serious expression, I know this is a personality trait; he finds it hard to accept help. There’s a lack of trust, most likely with anyone. I more than appreciate how that feels.

“So, do you feel able to tell me what’s wrong, Will? Or do you need some more time?”

“No, I think I can; I want to. When I met you at the wedding, I instantly knew you were the person to help me,” he says, keeping his eyes focused on the table, avoiding eye contact. “It’s just kind of hard saying everything out loud, you know?”

“Sure,” I reply with a sad smile, “believe me, I totally get that. I like to bottle things up too.”

“I keep having anxiety attacks,” he admits, “I even wake in the middle of the night, covered in sweat and finding it hard to breathe. It started off just a few times a week, but now it’s a daily and nightly occurrence. I’m actually afraid to go out without my little stash,” he says, patting his jacket pocket, to which I smile, appreciating his honesty.

“You know, if you’re having panic attacks, that probably isn’t the best thing to be doing,” I advise. “Have you been to your GP?”

He nods but looks unimpressed by the outcome.

“There’s nothing medically wrong with me, so he suggested I see someone. I suppose that’s what I’m doing by coming to see you,” he says with a shrug.

“Can I ask why you’re so adamant about your parents not knowing? I know you’re an adult now, but Penny said you were very firm about it. There’s nothing to be ashamed of with having panic attacks.”

“They’re very old school,” he sighs hopelessly, “very rich, very well connected, and very opinionated. They’d make me see their old fart of a doctor and I already know I would get nowhere with him. I wantyouto help me. But if they knew I was seeing you…” He trails off, blushing with embarrassment.

“Relax, Will, I know what kind of reputation I have. And I want to thank you for not telling them what I do; I appreciate your discretion. No one in my family knows what I do for a living, other than Nonna, and I would like to keep it that way.”

“No worries, but now, can I ask why?”

He frowns with complete confusion, because why would I not want to put them all straight and debunk the lies that are told about me? I have my reasons.

“Because…because it’s just something I do,” I eventually reply. “It’s a kind of a self-preservation tactic. I prefer to let them think the worst of me, so I have no connection to them whatsoever. They can judge and despise the fake me, but they won't ever know the real Izzy Chase. They have tried to destroy her for years. And who knows? Maybe they have. I can’t tell anymore.”

“This is why I want you to help me, Izzy,” he says. “I admire you, especially your strength. I want to build up that kind of strength too.”

“Well, I shall try my best,” I nod with determination, then move forward to retrieve my phone from my bag. “Let’s schedule some dates so we can get started. We can meet at my office in London or anywhere you feel comfortable, whichever is best for you.”

He nods with a relieved smile on his face while I get my calendar up to search for free appointments.

Chapter 11

Theo

“Cindy…no…Cindy…no wait, Cindy!”

Oh, for fuck’s sake, this is a conversation I could do without. I thought we were on the same page but apparently not. If I tell her about the arrangement between Grandma, Izzy, and me, she’ll go straight to Tilly and spill all. So, now she’s raging at me because I’m breaking off our arrangement with no clear explanation as to why. Stupidly, I thought having such an arrangement in lieu of a relationship meant one party could call it quits without all this drama.

“Look, Cindy, this was only ever a casual thing, you agreed!” I end up yelling, sounding thoroughly irritated by all the names she’s now calling me. “And it’s run its course so I’m sorry, but I’m going to hang up now.”

Daniel laughs at me from the chair on the opposite side of the desk, so I give him the finger and a warning glare, essentially telling him to keep his mouth shut. Unfortunately, this only encourages him to laugh even harder. Daniel is my best friend andbusiness partner, a guy I’ve known since before we had to move to England. He’s flown over from the States to stay here while we set up our second office in London, the first major city of our ‘European Takeover’. He’s never met Izzy before, but he sure as hell has heard of her. All my friends used to tease me over my love for the girl who I left behind and have frequently told me to ‘Build a bridge and get over it.’ But I guess I never have. It’s always been her.

I release a loud sigh before banging my head on the desk; this is one hell of a fucked- up situation I’ve gotten myself into. I’ve made promises to Grandma, which involves keeping Izzy in the dark about some major details of our arrangement, and now I’m living with a woman who can’t bear to be in the same room as me. She seems to hate me as much as she hates her family, and that’s saying something. I don’t even know who she is anymore.

“Well, as always, Theo, you’ve talked yourself into a headache,” Daniel teases as he leans back and crosses his legs over the top of my desk.

“You told me to build a bridge, so I did,” I huff with my face flattened against the cool wooden surface.

“And get over it! Not build a bridge into whatever you want to call this messed-up situation.”

I merely release a groan over the truth of his words; what was I thinking coming back to all this again? I should have left things as they were, believing Izzy had betrayed me, but at least knowing she was happy.

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