Page 82 of Resisting Desire

She takes another sip.

“I swear, if you run your tongue over the rim again, I’m not going to be responsible for what I’m going to do.” I grind out.

“Ethan,” she breathes out in a raspy voice. “You can’t say things like that.”

“Why not? You’re leaving in less than three weeks. We’re adults. We can talk like adults, wouldn’t you say?”

“You can’t flirt with me. It wouldn’t work anyway. That part of our relationship is over with permanently.” I see the shift in her eyes as she tries to tell herself the lie.

“Why? Why does it need to be done permanently? Let’s stop dancing around the topic and just be honest with each other.”

“We’re being honest with each other. I know you care about me, and I care about you, too.”

“It’s more than that, and you know it,” I challenge.

“Look, if you’re doing all of this because you want to make sure you get time with Matthew, you don’t have to worry about that. I want him to spend time with you. I won’t try to take that from you.”

She can’t be so oblivious to think I’m doing this for Matthew. Yes, I would love for him to be with me full time, but that’s not the reason I want Liz with me. She’s scared of our feelings and grasping at straws.

“Liz, look at me.” I hold her head between my hands. I have her full attention. “Yes, I love Matthew and want him in my life. Tonight, I’m not here for him, though. I’m here for you and only you. I’m crazy about you.”

Her eyes soften, and her lips part.

I lean into her, almost expecting her to turn away.

Then, she does something that shocks me, something I don’t expect her to do. She leans over and puts her lips to mine. She rubs her hands on my chest, then my shoulders. At first, I’m so stunned that I don’t know how to react. When I don’t immediately respond, she leans back and looks at me questioningly. She must see the answer in my eyes because she kisses me again. This time, she is bolder and more insistent. I’m so incredibly turned on by her assertiveness that I feel my body warming up. She coaxes her tongue not-so-gently into my mouth, and I take over. My mouth slants over hers again and again, and I could almost moan with the pleasure of it.

We both seem to realize where we are at the same time. We jerk back from each other. Her eyes focus slowly, confusion and passion showing on her face. “I’m sorry. I don’t know why I did that. I’m sorry. I’m not trying to be a tease.”

I touch my forehead to hers. I lay a light-as-a-feather kiss on her lips and whisper, “You did it because you want me as much as I want you. We can try to avoid it all you want, but it’s not going to make those feelings go away.”

She shakes her head. “Getting any more involved would be a huge mistake. Think about how we’ll both feel when I move away.”

“But think about all the fun we could have while you’re still here.”

Chapter 22

Liz

Days later, I’m still thinking about that kiss. Why am I tormenting myself? When Ethan suggested we spend some time together, for Matthew’s sake, I jumped on the excuse. I knew it would be difficult to be around him, but my heart ignored the warnings in my head. I’m a glutton for punishment. Oh, let’s go on a romantic cruise, let’s hold hands, let’s snuggle as we watch the sunset. Why the hell not?

Oh yeah, because nothing good can come of it.

I keep hoping the chemistry between us will go away. Now I see how unrealistic that wish is when we are in such close proximity all the time. Spending time with Ethan every day is only causing me to fall more in love with him. Even though I’m the one who will pay the price of a broken heart, I can’t stop the train wreck from happening.

I can’t even blame Ethan. He’s made no move to kiss me or even imply that he wants anything more than friendship. Well, until I messed that up at the speakeasy. I don’t know what possessed me to kiss him! It’s just thathe was so close and looked so sexy, with his gorgeous eyes glittering in the candlelight. It was as though my body didn’t have a choice. The need to touch him, kiss him, was so great that I didn’t care about repercussions.

Of course, he responded by implying that we should sleep together. With him, it’s always about sex. I refuse to admit to myself that I wanted to say yes. Luckily, he had more sense than me. He took me home, kissed me on the cheek in a brotherly way, and said goodnight as he went to his room.

Tonight, we’re staying in. He took my suggestion and found us a movie to watch in his home theater. We’re going to order pizza and have a relaxing night at home.

Ethan’s voice breaks through my thoughts. He walks in wearing his flannel pj bottoms and a t-shirt. “Are you ready for the movie? The pizza was just delivered.” He holds up a box from my favorite pizza place.

“Yes, I’m ready,” I tell him excitedly. “I’m looking forward to some downtime. It’s been a while since I’ve been able just to lie around and relax.”

We start heading up to the theater.

“My mom just texted and said to tell you thanks for letting him stay over at their place tonight. My parents are going to really miss him when you two move.”

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