Page 127 of Stuck Behind Her

“How did you know?” I ask him.

“She hasn’t come out of her room today, and you guys went out yesterday. You said you needed to tell her, so I figured you did it then.”

I look up at him, taking in a shaky breath. “I had to. Times running out, I’d rather tell her before I leave. Give her more time,” I reply. He nods his head now, turning his head to look in front of him. “I’m sorry, again, for everything.”

“You don’t need to apologize, you already did,” he replies.

“I will keep apologizing until the day I leave. I need to make up for it.”

“You don’t need to, Lorenzo. It’s okay, you were just looking out for her. And I don’t know what my father did, but I know you wouldn’t do anything without reason. I just hope I had nothing to do with it.”

What Roland did was horrible. So much more than what I was blaming Elias for. He betrayed everyone, and they don’t even know it. I know for a fact that Elias would be so much angrier than I am if he found out what his dad did. Roland knows that keeping this from everyone is sparing him from. I hope someday he isn’t spared. That Roland faces every single consequence for doing what he did. I hope he loses everyone, and that he regrets it for the rest of his life.

“It didn’t, don’t worry. You don’t even know what it is. Not many do, unfortunately. But someday you will, I know it. And then you’ll understand why I did it what I did,” I tell him.

He exhales, looking up at the ceiling. “So, this is it? Five more days?”

I hum a smallhmmmin agreement. Five days, and it’s all gone. It still hurts, just the same as the first time. I haven’t gotten used to it.

I turn to Elias again. “Can I ask you for a favor? I know I’m not entitled to it, so you can tell me to stop right now,” I ask.

He turns to face me as well “Of course.”

“When I leave, can you promise you’ll check on her. It doesn’t have to be the first day or first week, but that you’ll make sure she stays okay? And that you’ll look after her, no matter how long it takes her to realize she wants you. I know it’s a lot, but I underestimated your trust, and you deserve mine now. I trust you to make sure she’s okay.”

I know it’s not fair to ask, and I know her mom will still do more than anyone, but she needs someone else as a distraction from my absence. I know he’ll do that better than anyone else.

He looks at me, a glassy look in his eyes. “I will. I promise,” he replies.

I give him a small smile. Elias isn’t one to break his promises, at least not by choice. He will do anything to keep them. And I’m leaving all my trust with him. To be there for her, even when she’s closed off and doesn’t want him there. Even when she’s at her worst. I trust that Vi will have someone with her. That’s all I want.

Chapter 81 – Quattro

Val

Four more days. Four more days before it’s all over. He’s dying. Lorenzo is dying. I lie in my bed, my eyes burning. I didn’t get out of bed at all yesterday. I didn’t even move. I couldn’t. I didn’t want to. I thought maybe time would go slower if I did nothing, but, instead, it only went faster. I just want a way to slow things down. For everything to freeze. For Lorenzo to stay. Like maybe if he stays in Los Angeles, he won’t die. But that’s not it. He’s not leaving to death. His death is already near, he’s just leaving before it gets to him.

Every time I think about it, my eyes fill with tears. My heart aches, and sometimes it feels like it’s stopping. Like it’s not beating anymore. Like it’s frozen in time, except time isn’t. It’s still passing, and he’ll still leave. It hurts like hell. Like fucking hell, and I want to get out. I want him to tell me it was a joke, that it was all a lie. Maybe they misdiagnosed him. I’m still holding onto the imaginary string of hope, waiting for some typeof reassurance that he’s staying. But he isn’t. This isn’t a lie, it’s all the truth. The ugly truth.

I want to get out of bed. I want to spend every last second of these remaining days with him. Leaning onto his arm, hugging him. Hearing his jokes and funny comments. Hearing him tell me about all his fashion line. How he wishes he can send every piece of clothing he’s designed to me because of how proud he feels when I wear them. It’s these last four days, before I never get them again. Before they’re part of the past. Before they’re never part of my life anymore, and I have to search through other people for those things, except I won’t find them. Because he’s one of a kind. Because he’sLorenzo, except he’ll be gone. So, they won’t be found. They’ll be non-existent.

A knock on the door makes me sit up. I try to wipe away any tears on my face, even though I know I look like a mess. “Come in,” I call, noticing how fragile my voice sounds. The door opens slightly, revealing Aurora.

“Hey Val. Are you busy?” she asks. I shake my head, placing my hands on my thighs. “Well, Ellie needs you, and Lorenzo was asking to talk to you.”

I stand up, feeling slightly lightheaded at first and it takes me a few moments to regain my balance. “I’ll go see what they want,” I tell her, and she smiles as she moves away back to the door. I walk to the living room, where Ellie is sitting on the couch.

She jumps up when she notices me. “Vi! Elaina and Aurora are going out, I want to go with them. Please let me go,” Ellie begs. I take a deep breath. I don’t want Ellie to go anywhere right now, especially without me.

“No, Ellie. I’m sorry,” I tell her.

She frowns. “Come on. Aurora’s okay with it, please?”

“Ellie.” I eye her. She crosses her arms, throwing herself back on the couch. I turn to Aurora.

“I can take her, it really won’t be a problem,” she offers. No. The last thing I need is to worry about her, too. I want her here, with me. Somewhere I can see her. Somewhere I’m sure she’ll be safe.

“Don’t worry, it’s not that. I just don’t want her to go today,” I explain.

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