Page 32 of Gingers Can Do Maths

She watches me breathlessly as I suck each digit until her essence is completely gone from my hand but I’m still starving.

I slide down the bed, down to the cradle of her thighs that widen as I settle into place right where I belong, feasting on my sweet pussy.

Sin’s fingers tangle in my hair, stroking my scalp and with my tongue in her cunt, and my nose against her clit, I swear it’s the best feeling in the world. The most comforting sensation as her scent strangles me.

“Why did you hide from me?” she asks gently as I tongue fuck her. I don’t want to take my lips from hers but I do for just a second.

“You hurt me so I wanted you to hurt without me too. I wanted you to feel how unbearable the pain was.”

“I did,” she gasps, her toes curling. “You know I did. You saw me aching for you. Why didn’t you just show yourself once you realised I missed you too? That I wanted you more than anything else.”

“I told you. I put thoughts into your head. I manipulated those dreams.”

She shakes her head. “Han, I dreamed about you before we even stopped talking. They got more explicit with age but they were always there, haunting me.”

I release her clit with a pop and she bucks, forcing me off her with another moan.

“Please!I need a minute.”

“You were built to go rounds, Sin.”

But she curls her knees in front of her chest protectively, putting distance between us even as she clearly tries to stop the tingles radiating through her.

I roll her onto her side and hold her so we’re face to face, eye to eye.

“But why do you want me to? Why do you want to still fuck me, pleasure me after I showed you the letter? The three-year-long lie?”

“Because nothing in those three years, and nothing now could change the way I feel about you Sin. Nothing anyone says. Nothing you say. Nothing I try to tell myself. I realised that a long time ago.”

She gazes at me quizzically and I go on.

“I tried to punish you. I tried to make you hurt by cutting off contact like I said. But I got no pleasure out ofhopingyou were hurt. So I convinced myself, if I could prove that you were, I’d feel better.”

“So you started stalking me?”

I nod. “But I didn’t feel better when I saw you cry in your sleep. Or when you’d check online to see if I’d finally made a profile you could stalk. Or when you checked Ennox’s website and news articles repeatedly hoping you’d find me in the physics or robotics clubs.”

“I just wanted a glimpse of you,” she confesses. “I think not knowing what happened to you was worse than you not wanting to talk to me. If I could just see you. If I could just know that you were okay even without me I could feel a bit better.”

“It was cruel. I meant it to be and I’m sorry.”

Her eyes flutter to mine. “Why didn’t you go to Ennox?”

“You weren’t there.”

“But neither would I be at Bradley.”

“Exactly. If I went to Ennox I risked you popping up on campus the following year if somehow you changed your mind. At Bradley, there was no way that you could. I wouldn’t have to risk seeing you ever again. That’s what I told myself anyway, but in the recesses of my mind there were more reasons.”

“Like?”

“First there were the logical ones. Bradley also has a great physics department. My parents had already sold the house to travel so I still needed a boarding school and Bradley is one. But then the real reasoning started to creep in. I couldn’t go to Ennox because it was supposed to be our first, and without you, there was no first so it was meaningless. Then there came the undeniable truth that if I couldn’t see you. Smell you. Touch you. Everything else was meaningless too.”

I reach out to stroke her cheek and immediately find comfort in her warmth.

“That’s when I searched Bradley’s distance from Hortace. I studied the forest. Hortace’s perimeter gate. You. Then I trailed you to your dorm.”

“Did you also go to Bradley to stay away from other girls? Did you think they’d distract you?”

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