Page 38 of Organized Chaos

Margo eased her horse onto another path, and they dipped back into the shade. Too soon they rode back in sight of the barn and dismounted.

Roger met them at the barn doors and lifted a hand in greeting. “Phillip, have you seen the barn file?”

Phillip swung to the ground. “Not since lunchtime. I left it on the desk once I finished making notes on the vet visits scheduled for next week.”

Sarah managed to clamber from her saddle without assistance. Her legs didn’t even ache this time, proof that she was getting better at riding.

“Sarah?” Phillip motioned her over. “Did you see a blue folder while we were in the office?”

“No.” She scrunched her nose as she thought back. “Honestly though, I wasn’t paying attention.” She snapped her fingers. “It could have fallen off the desk when I knocked the box down.”

Phillip took off his hat and threaded his fingers through his hair. “Why doesn’t that surprise me.” His tone was teasing, but Sarah heard the genuine frustration.

Her anger snapped to attention. “I don’t know.” Her hands went to her hips. “I’m just a klutz, right. Must be my fault. I simply can’t help myself.”

Roger took a step back and held up a hand. “I’ll go look again.”

Tim and the others gave Sarah and Phillip a wide berth as they walked their mounts into the barn.

“What are you talking about?” Phillip reached for Tank’s reins.

Sarah shoved them in his direction and forced her feet to back away. “You probably thought you were being cute, calling me a klutz and saying all those other things about me today.” She tried to wrangle her emotions back into some kind of order, but they were like everything else in her life. They spilled out, making a mess and refusing to obey her.

Phillip’s brows crimped together. “I like that you’re clumsy.” He ran a hand over his mouth. “That didn’t come out right. It’s just.” He motioned vaguely toward the barn. “Those files are important. Losing them means weeks of extra work.”

Sarah scuffed her boot in the dirt and stared at her toes. Hot tears burned the back of her throat. “And I’m an inconvenience. I lose things all the time. Not the kind of person you want around your precious documents.”

“That’s not what I said. Now or during the podcast.” Phillip stretched out a hand toward her, but she moved out of reach. “I was trying to be spontaneous.”

Her head weaved back and forth. “You hurt my feelings.” Her chin lifted and she met his gaze head on. “Go back and listen to the podcast like you’re me. See what you think then.” She patted Tank and gave him a piece of carrot she’d hidden away in her pocket. The farewell shouldn’t hurt so much after only knowing the horse for a few days. Then again, hearing what Phillip really thought of her shouldn’t matter this much either. Not considering they were barely acquaintances. “You were right.”

Silence so thick it choked her slammed into place. Even the birds stopped chirping and the horses stood silent.

“What are you saying?” Phillip’s chest rose and fell in sharp movements. He twisted the reins around his hands.

Sarah opened her mouth. Closed it. Opened it again. What was she saying?

Her thoughts ran together in a bubbling stream. She grabbed one and reeled it in. “You said you didn’t know what to do about this. About us. Well, neither do I. And after today, I need some time away from all this.”

Being this close to him muddled her thoughts. He made her want things that were not possible. Not when they were so different.

“Losing the files was an accident. I know that.” Phillip dropped the reins and held up both hands like the gesture of surrender would be enough to bring her back. “We’ll find them. They have to be in the office somewhere. It’s not like you meant to lose them.”

“That’s just it. You blame me, even though you don’t know what happened. You don’t know if I knocked them down, but you assume that I did. You assume a lot about me. You made me sound like a joke.” Her voice broke and she turned on her heel, desperate not to let him see her cry. “I’m going home.”

She raced to her truck and climbed inside. Phillip, being the orderly person that he was, wouldn’t be able to follow her. He’d take care of the horses and help his dad find the files. Those things made sense to him. Running after Sarah did not fit into his neatly organized life.

With the truck in gear, she turned the wheel and headed down the drive.

Phillip appeared in her rearview mirror. He had the horses’ reins back in his hands and indecision warred on his face. He took a step toward her, then his shoulders deflated, and he turned on his heel and disappeared into the barn.

Being right shouldn’t feel so wretched. She’d let herself get attached to Phillip and now she’d pay the price.

CHAPTER FOURTEEN

Phillip pulled into Sarah’s driveway the next morning, ready and willing to apologize. Sarah was right. After she had left, he’d gone back and listened to the podcast with a fresh perspective, and he could admit that at times he did sound like he was making fun of Sarah. That hadn’t been his intention.

His attempt at charming fell completely flat, and he’d pushed Sarah away. To make matters worse, she’d been right about the ranch files too. He’d been the one to misplace them. Her knocking the hat box off the desk had nothing to do with it. He’d carried them with him to the feed room and left them on top of a stack of feed bags. He could argue that he’d been distracted by the idea of seeing Sarah later, and it would be completely true. But that wasn’t her fault.

---