Page 53 of To Catch a Firefly

“Hey,” I say, my voice sounding loud in the still night air. “How are you doing?”

Ellis is quiet for a moment, and I cringe.How are you doing? Really?

“Good,” he finally says. “You?”

I nearly smack my forehead against the tile pillar nearby. “I’m good, El. It’s good to hear you.”

He hums, and I force a slow breath through my body. This is Ellis. Still my Ellis. Always.

“Dani and I are in Crete,” I say, figuring the quickest way past this awkwardness is just to dive in. “The island is gorgeous, andthe people here have been so welcoming. We visited the Palace of Knossos yesterday.”

He makes a curious sound.

“It was fascinating,” I admit, settling against the rail. “Haunting, too. So much of it is just rubble now, but it’s like…you could see what it used to be, you know? The grandeur of it. Legend has it the Minotaur was kept in Knossos in an underground labyrinth.”

He hums, and I smile.

“Yeah, can you imagine? We’ll be hiking the Samaria Gorge the day after tomorrow. It’s about ten miles down on foot, but they shuttle you back to town afterward, so you don’t have to make the climb back up. Probably a good thing. I’ve heard the views are gorgeous. I bet I’ll be snapping pictures the entire way.”

Ellis makes another soft sound, and it’s so comforting and familiar that my eyes slip shut.

“I’m sorry,” I whisper. He doesn’t reply right away, so I keep going. “El, I’msorry. I know things have been…weird, but it’s not your fault, okay? I’m just… I guess I’ve just been going through some stuff.”

“What can I do?” he asks slowly.

God.God.

“Nothing,” I tell him, voice hoarse. “Just…keep being you. That helps.”

“I can do that,” he says, and I huff a small laugh.

“How, um… How are things going with Gabby?”

I haven’t been able to bring myself to ask before now. I didn’t want to know, but I can’t keep sticking my head in the sand. If I want to repair this, I have to make an effort to be the friend Ellis deserves.

He makes a curious sound, one I’m not quite sure how to decipher.

“Good?” I ask. “Not good?”

“We’re…”

The silence stretches. “What?”Madly in love and planning the wedding? Fucking like bunnies? Getting matching tattoos?

I cut that line of thinking off at the head.

“Not together,” he finishes.

“Wh-what?” I ask, a little stilted. “It didn’t work out?”

I shouldn’t be happy about that. IknowI shouldn’t. But I can’t help the utter relief that rushes through me at hearing those words. Guilt follows quickly on its heels.

“Never together,” Ellis says.

I blink out past the veranda, his meaning not computing. “Wait, what? You just had the one date?”

“No date,” he answers.

My mouth opens.

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