Page 102 of To Catch a Firefly

There are some murmured agreements, and Lucky and our former classmates start catching up, but my gaze gets caught across the room. It’s been a while since I’ve been in here, and I almost forgot about the picture on the wall behind the pool tables. It’s old, sepia in tone and dated back to the fifties. In it, two teams stand across from one another, a thick rope stretched taut between them. A tug-of-war competition. Pulpers versus huskers. It’s an old rivalry in our town, but one that doesn’t exist today.

I can’t help but wonder what Lucky would have become if he’d stayed here after college. Would he have worked freelance, trying to sell his photography? If he couldn’t make ends meet, would he have followed his dad’s footsteps and signed on at the paper mill, becoming a pulper himself?

It’s not an alternative I like to imagine. He told me he would have stayed for me, but I couldn’t have asked him to. Not then. He was just spreading his wings. I missed him while he was gone, the same as he missed me. But I’m not sure I’d change it. He was worth the wait.

“Okay?” Lucky asks me quietly, leaning close.

I give him a nod. “I’m glad…you’re you.”

He gives me a quizzical look. “Yeah?”

“Mm. Glad you’re here…too.”

His smile softens. “Me, too, big guy. Want a beer?”

I nod, and Lucky squeezes my leg.

“Be right back,” he says before standing and walking off.

Noticing Riley staring off toward the entrance of the bar, I follow his gaze. Gabby gives me a wave as she shucks off the hood of her coat. Her friend says something to her, and Gabby nods, gesturing to me in a way I take to meangive me a minute. Riley, I notice, is still watching her.

“Gabby…has a dog,” I tell him.

His gaze shifts my way, eyebrows popping up. “Yeah?”

I nod. “Ask her.”

He huffs a small laugh, rubbing the back of his neck. “Thanks, Ellis.”

When Gabby comes over, her cheeks are flushed from the cold, and she’s wearing a big smile. “Hey! I didn’t know you were going to be here.”

I shrug.I didn’t either.“Gabs, you know Riley?”

She turns his way, smile still in place. “Yeah, I think so. You work with Ellis, right?”

Riley nods, shifting over now that a couple of our tablemates are gone. “I do. Wanna sit?”

“Sure,” Gabby says, sliding in next to him and removing her coat.

“So, um,” Riley says. “I hear you have a dog?”

Gabby beams. “I do! Her name is Toodles. Do you like dogs?”

As Riley and Gabby chat, Gabby’s friend comes over to the table, claiming Lucky’s seat. I turn my head, finding him at the bar. He’s passing cash to the bartender, and when he turns around with two pints in his hands, his eyes find mine. I can’t look away as he walks over, and when he reaches me, I tug him onto my lap, careful not to disturb the glasses in his hands.

He huffs a laugh, settling on my thighs and passing off one of the drinks. “Getting frisky with me in public, Ellis?” he asks, his words sounding teasing.

“No seats,” I defend, hand holding tight to his lower back.

His smile is crooked. “Mhm. You really don’t care, do you?”

I cock my head.

“Nothing,” he says, shaking his head. “I’m glad you’re you, too.”

With Lucky’s back to the table, he can’t keep up with conversation, but he doesn’t seem to mind. He sips his beer, one arm around my neck, his weight settled comfortably on my lap. He sways gently, humming to the music in the bar, and I watch him and the way his eyes shift shades, almost as if in tune to his mood.

It only takes a minute before I hear, “Oh my gosh, Lucky?”

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