Page 15 of Lucky in Love

“Because you’re different. I don’t know.” My defense is falling apart and I’m starting to doubt myself, so I try another tactic. “You’re so put-together. You’re cheerful and happy and I would just bring you down. You don’t need my problems.”

“Everyone handles their struggles differently.” She shrugs and looks up like she’s contemplating whether to tell me something. Then she sits down and grabs my hand, pulling me down with her. She leans her head back on the wooden stall door and sighs. “When I was 16, I was diagnosed with thyroid cancer.”

“Oh, Paige. I can’t imagine dealing with that as a teenager.” How could I be so stupid for assuming I’m the only person with problems?

“I didn’t deal with it very well, truthfully. I was angry and in denial. I lashed out at my parents who were already beside themselves with worry. I even ran away to avoid the surgery I needed. So stupid, like I thought I could avoid cancer by running away from it. I ran to my cousin Fiona’s, here in EvergreenMountain. She helped me hide out for a couple of days until she could talk some sense into me and then she sat by my side through my recovery.”

“I’m glad she was there for you.”

“Yeah, she’s pretty great.” She looks up at me smiling and brushes away a tear. “She helped me realize how blessed I was to have people supporting me and to have a treatment option with the potential to make me cancer-free. We aren’t promised tomorrow, so I learned to live every day to the fullest. But it took a long time for me to get to that point.”

“That’s a really good outlook to have.” I’m smiling, thankful to Fiona for helping her. Thankful that she’s sitting here with me.

“You were at war and you experienced trauma. The social anxiety is your brain’s way of coping with that trauma.” She takes my hand in hers, her green eyes glowing with intensity. “You are not broken. You are strong. Your experience gives you a depth of emotion that most people don’t have. I think that’s why you’re so good with the rescue horses. They can sense that.”

The relief of being seen for the first time in years is overwhelming. I put my arms around her and kiss her forehead, unshed tears burning my eyes.

“Thank you,” I say, once I’m sure my voice will be steady.

“Baylor, there’s something really special between us.” She searches my expression. “There’s just something about you that feels right. Like we fit together.”

All of my fears are still there: Fear that I’m too messed up, that I’ll hurt her or let her down. But I realize that she’s strong too.

“I’ve been shutting people out for a long time. But since the first day you came to my ranch, you walked right into my heart. When I’m with you, I feel like all my pieces are glued back together. But here’s the thing. I don’t think I could bear a break-up.”

She nods her head and presses her lips together. “Well, then let’s never break up,” she says, her face splitting into a grin.

I tuck a stray strand of hair behind her ear and she puts her arms around my neck. We sway back and forth, like we’re dancing without music and I brush my lips back and forth against hers and say a prayer for a thousand more moments just like this.

EPILOGUE

Paige

We tried to keep our invitation list small, but between both of our families and all of our friends, it’s still a crowd in Baylor’s eyes.

“It’s going to be okay, babe. The only people who are allowed to talk to you are me and the preacher.” Baylor and I are standing back to back, him in his tux and me in my wedding dress. We may be bending the rule by talking to each other before the wedding, but we’re not breaking it.

He puts his hands in mine and squeezes. “As long as you’re with me, I can do this. I love you so much, Paige.”

“I love you, too.” I give his hand one last squeeze and head back to the bridal room to grab my bouquet of yellow roses.

Baylor has made so much progress in the last 18 months since we got together. He goes to the grocery store and feed store himself instead of having things delivered. We go out to eat at Fiona’s for lunch, though he still avoids the loud night crowd there. But at a wedding, all eyes are on the bride and groomand that is nerve-wracking, even for me. Butterflies swarm in my tummy, but I can’t wait to be united forever with my soulmate.

Fiona is waiting for me at the entrance of the church. “Oh Paige, you look beautiful,” she says in a breathy voice. She helped me picked out the satin off-the-shoulder a-line dress and helped me put it on, but she’s giving me a look like she’s seeing it for the first time. The corners of her mouth turn down and a wrinkle forms between her eyes.

“You’re not allowed to cry, Fiona! If you cry, I’ll cry!” I fan my face and look up, wishing away the tears that are threatening to stream down my face. “It’ll ruin our makeup!”

“I just love you so much, cousin.”

“Awww, I love you too.” She pulls me into an embrace and I hug her back.

“Now, let’s do this.” She says, pulling herself together. My dad steps next to me and I tuck my hand in the crook of his arm, purposely not looking at him to avoid starting the crying cycle over again.

“I’m so proud of you,” he whispers as the wedding march starts.

I bite my lip and follow Addie, our flower girl, as she tosses yellow rose petals down the aisle. Halfway down the aisle, I look up and see my three bridesmaids, Fiona, Ginger and Mariah glowing in buttery yellow dresses. Then I glance to the right side of the church and see my sweet Baylor, looking handsome in his tux, with tears streaming down his face. His eyes connect with mine and for the rest of the ceremony, it’s like we’re the only two people in the room. We say our vows,promising to love and honor each other, knowing no one could ever tear us apart.

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