Page 85 of Slow Burn (The Boston Beauties)

When I was unable to get back to sleep despite trying for over an hour, I finally gave up. I reached over to grab my phone to find a message from Drew letting me know he was on the plane about to take off with my father, Abby, and Amber.

I was nearing the end of my first trimester and starting to feel a little bit more like myself again. Unfortunately, I was also starting to show slightly, not so much that others would notice, but I was seeing the small changes in my own body. I hadn’t seen Drew in about two weeks, I was sure he would be able to tell the difference as soon as he saw me again. As everyone was so used to me being heavier, a little weight on me wouldn’t be amiss, and I was also wearing clothes that concealed my stomach for the most part.

The past few weeks had been a rollercoaster of emotions.

First, Drew and I decided that as I was in Vegas, and we only wanted a small wedding, that we should just elope. It also meant that he could plead the fifth to any involvement with me and my disappearance. Not that he had any knowledge of it at the time, but he had known for over a year and kept it hidden. I didn’t want him to be charged as an accomplice.

When I told my mother that I wanted a small intimate wedding, here in Vegas, I was shocked when she agreed without any fuss about throwing a large society event back in Boston.

Once the decision was made, everything seemed to happen on fast-forward. We secured a large AirBnB to accommodate most of the guests, and another nearby to house the others. Booked caterers who also did decorating, an officiant, and flowers. And one of the most important tasks, found a dress for me to wear. It was an intense week, but really not all that much work as the caterers proved to be almost a one-stop shop. It was shaping up to be the complete opposite of what my mother had been planning for my wedding to Matt back in Boston. It felt like planning an elaborate dinner party rather than a wedding.

While it was classy, elegant and would be beautiful, it was small and intimate. The hardest part was getting most of the guests here to Vegas. Thankfully there were fewer than 20 on the guest list and my father owned a few jets.

I fell in love with the first dress I tried on but humored my mother by trying on a few of the ones she picked out. I was cautious of my little bump starting to make an appearance. I purchased my shoes and accessories straight from the bridal shop as well. Our rings took less than an hour at a jeweler, as did my flowers at the florist. And I felt like I was winning when I booked the officiant from my smartphone while in the passenger’s seat as my mother drove us to LA from Vegas to meet Zoe.

She didn’t know I was alive, let alone a dinner guest, but had agreed to meet my mother for dinner at the hotel suite my mother had booked. I was so nauseous the entire drive, I didn't know if it was motion sickness, pregnancy, nerves, or all of the above.

I wasn’t sure how this evening was going to go. Drew had told me how much Zoe had been affected when I ‘disappeared.’ I knew it stemmed from her losing her best friend as a teen when she was in high school, and it's one of the reasons why she’s so untrusting and has such a small social circle. I think she’s afraid to let anyone in for fear of losing them.

For some reason, Zoe and I hit it off instantly that first day of freshman orientation, which was odd for both of us. It was really after the death of my brother Josh that our bond was cemented. She knew what I was going through and was one of the only people who had the patience to let me grieve him. She wasn’t afraid to bring him up, because she knew how important it was to keep the memories of those that you loved close.

So many of the people I knew would skirt around the issue, afraid to mention Josh’s name for fear I’d remember him. What they didn't know was, I’ll never forget him. Hearing his name doesn’t make me sad; in fact, it makes me happy that someone cared enough about him to also remember him, no matter how much it might hurt to think of the gap he left in our lives.

I knew her well enough to know that it was a strong possibility that she was going to be upset with me, and might not actually want to speak to me. I knew what I did was cruel, but I was hoping that she would listen to the reasons and see why I had no other choice.

My mother was watching TV while I sat out on the balcony under a large umbrella reading some items on Mylie’s blog. It had been a few months since the last chapter of her latest book was released, and all her die-hard followers were itching for more.

I heard the phone ring, knowing it would be the front desk to let us know that Zoe was here. I put my tablet down and walked into the living room. ‘You ready for this?’ my mother asked me. She knew how anxious I was to see Zoe. It was completely different from seeing Drew for the first time. He had found out over text message, likely not the best way, but at least I didn’t have to deal with seeing his reaction. Abby was family, she was also a lawyer, seasoned at hiding her reactions, who could also see why. But Zoe, as tough as she pretended to be, was a sensitive soul, and I knew what I did hurt her to her core.

I took a deep breath as I heard the knock on the door. ‘Yeah.’

I stood to the side, next to the kitchenette off the small living room as my mother opened the door.

‘Zoe,’ my mother greeted my best friend in a hug when the door closed. ‘It’s been too long, I can’t wait till Steve has you home again and your training is completed.’

‘Me too,’ she pulled away, still not seeing me. After my father’s heart attack, Zoe had been asked to come out to LA temporarily to help set up the west coast operation at one of the airports. Her coach’s daughter attended university out here, and there were also top-notch training facilities and many of the national team swimmers were currently training out here in advance for the Olympics this summer.

‘Come in,’ my mother ushered her further into the suite. ‘I have someone here…’

At that point Zoe looked up to see me. She only had to do one double-take for the smile on her face to fall and the anger in her eyes to illuminate.

She stared at me long and hard, silent for a few full minutes, though it seemed like an eternity. ‘How dare you!’ she roared pointing a finger at me.

I went to take a step closer to her, ‘I can explain.’

‘No,’ she shouted, putting her hand out to stop my advancing. ‘No, you don’t get to explain. Do you have any idea what you put your parents through, what you put Drew through?’

I nodded, noticing how she was trying not to make this about her, but what she was really saying was all about her.

‘I know how much hurt I must have caused you.’

She shook her head, ‘No, I don't think you do, because if you had any idea at all, you would never have left.’

‘I didn’t have a choice.’ I felt the tears starting.

‘But you did have a choice to let me know you were alive,’ I heard her voice crack. ‘Me, of all people.’ She took one more look at me before she turned to leave, but my mother reached out and held her arm.

‘Please, Zoe, can you stay? We have a lot to discuss.’

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