Page 106 of Deeper

I make my voice a little louder. “Wake up. I found an envelope at my house. I think it’s from Willy.”

Her eyes open, and it takes her a second to adjust. “What’s going on? Did you see Willy?”

“No, but I found this.” I show her the envelope.

“It’s addressed to both of us,” she states.

“I know.”

Guilt isn’t something I experience regularly, maybe ever really, but as I sit with Rylan, about to read Willy’s words, it’s eating at me. Selfishly, I know I’ll let Willy stay where he is, locked away for crimes he had nothing to do with so that I can keep her safe. There was another way, but Willy took things into his own hands and out of ours. The police will now never see the evidence that connects Elena to the crimes.

“Read it.”

And I do…

Dearest Rylan,

I recognized you. My mind isn’t going yet. I remembered you from the news coverage about your friend. I’m sorry for your pain. I know it well.

You see…Laurence Rawlings was my grandson. My daughter left him in our care when he was a young boy, and he was a handful right from the beginning. He was headstrong and stubborn but never cruel.

Once he was a teenager, things started to get out of control, and he went to live with his father, a man he had never met. I kept tabs on him and tried to bring good influence, but he only became further out of reach. His father gave him a new lifestyle, filled with money and entitlement. The older he got, the less I recognized him. His behavior wasn’t a phase and wasn’t going away.

I know what he did to your friend. I know he’s responsible. He hurt her, and I’m sorry. I can’t say I’m sorry enough for the pain my grandson caused you. I hope, now that he’s gone, you can heal.

Love can mend all wounds.

And that brings me to you, Callen. I’m a lot more observant than you think, and don’t you forget that. After I met your Rylan. I knew what I was encouraging between the two of you even if you thought you were getting one over on me. What you’re doing for her…I’ve thought about doing it myself many times. I just never had the guts. Laurence was still my blood.

I’m sure you’re wondering why I confessed. I did it for you, for Rylan, for myself, but also for Louise.

It’s hard for me to write down the pain Laurence caused me, but you deserve to know. That boy killed my Louise. His hands may not have done the job, but his actions did. She found out what he did to that girl and the others, and the pain was too much for her, knowing her only grandson was a monster. Her immense grief over what he’d done, who he was, caused her death. He took my heart from me, his own grandmother.

My confession is a gift, unconditional, but don’t throw it away. Don’t make trouble about this. Let me do this for you and for the woman I fell in love with as a teenager.

Love is always the answer, Callen.

Love her fiercely and treat her well. Find the type of love with her that I had with my Louise. Don’t let your own stupidity hold you back. I saw the way you look at Rylan. It’s the same way I always looked at the love of my life.

Be the reason she smiles and never the reason she cries. Don’t let fights linger too long, but take a step away from the argument when you need to. Love each other blindly, but push each other to grow. Put her first above all, but take time for yourself. Take on hurdles together, and never shut her out.

Callen, don’t screw this up. I mean it.

Willy, the Horseshoe Master

P.S. Take that girl of yours on a proper date, and I don’t mean that sex-crazed club.

I promise, to all of it. I make a vow to the first person who ever held me accountable.

Willy did this for us. That old man did it for love. He did it because his grandson broke his heart. We killed my nosy neighbor’s flesh and blood, and he showed us mercy. It’s fucking funny how life connects us, but then again…maybe it isn’t.

---