Page 84 of Fangirl Down

Wells ducked, watching the footwear sail over his right shoulder. “You’re right. Let me start over.” His silence extended longer than she expected. “First off, the fact that you stood up for me in there even after seeing and hearing... that bullshit. God, belle. I don’t fucking deserve you. Okay? Can we just get that part out of the way?”

Her whole face felt as though it welled up. “And? Keep going.”

Wells looked like a man walking on a tightrope tied between two skyscrapers. “When I called Buck for help, I just wanted to get back on the tour by any means necessary. I never thought it would go this far. Never thought you’d become some kind of ridiculous narrative.”

“I’m not a charity case,” she said in a strangled whisper.

“Damn right you’re not.” He slammed a fist to his chest. “I’mthe charity case here. It’s me. You’re the one bringing me back from extinction.”

Listening to Wells put himself down wasn’t making Josephine feel any better. “What are they saying about the shop? Are my parents going to find out the insurance had lapsed? That needing the money for repairs and oh God,insulinis the reason I’m caddying for you?”

He closed his eyes. “Yes.”

“Wells.” She covered her face with her hands. “This isn’t happening. Do you know how hard I had to work to make them trust me? To believe they could let go and let me handle the shopandmy condition? Now they know I’m a fraud.”

“You. Are not. A fraud. Don’t you dare. You can’t control hurricanes and a fucked-up health-care system, Josephine. You are the furthest thing from a fraud I’ve ever met in my life.” He ripped at his hair. “I’m going to take care of this. I’m going to fix their misconceptions about you, about us, the first chance I get. Tonight.”

“Leave it alone, Wells. Please. You’re only going to draw more attention to the story.”

He stared at her hard for a moment, before pacing away and shouting a curse up at the sky. “This is my fault. I shouldn’t have trusted Buck. But you have to believe me, I never thought it would go further than the tour directors. I’m sorry, Josephine.”

She exhaled sharply. “I know.”

A heavy pause ensued. “I’m afraid to ask where this leaves us.”

“What do you mean?”

“I mean...” He turned around again, but his eyes were a lot more haunted this time. “You’d be well within your rights to tell me to fuck off.”

“I’m not going to do that. I might be mad right now, but Iknow... I know some parts of that story are correct. Youarehelping me.”

“That pales in comparison to what you’ve already done for me, Josephine. You make anything feel possible. You woke me up again.”

She took several deep breaths, trying to comb through her scattered pride—her optimism that had been shot full of bullet holes—and find a way forward. Taking some time to sit and think privately might have done her a lot of good, but this wasn’t the kind of frustration that could be slept on. His words were beautiful, but they didn’t change the situation—and it wouldn’t look different in the morning.

Earning respect meant taking her job seriouslynow. Earning respect meant convincing people within the sport to takeherseriously. Other caddies, golfers, officials, spectators. A romance with her boss could preclude her from that. In addition to the angle already taken by the media, being in a public relationship with Wells would only diminish her capabilities more.

Josephine could hear the speculation now.

She landed that job only because she’s his girlfriend.

What a stand-up guy, taking care of her like that.

“I’ll be at the tournament in California, but I think it’s probably a good idea if we just back off on... whatever was happening between us. Okay?”

He closed his eyes slowly, jaw flexing.

“You know my plan is to reopen the Golden Tee. To competewith the bigger courses in Palm Beach, and this is my chance. But I need to be seen as... ascapablefor that to happen. And that’s hard enough for me withoutalsobeing known for having an incurable disease and a flooded pro shop. Rescued and put back on her feet by Wells Whitaker himself. I don’t want success that way. And imagine the slant on that story if we were also dating.” Heat swamped her face. “I mean, I’m not making thatassumption. I just—”

“Assume all you like, belle,” he said, very adamantly. “I want to date the hell out of you.”

Even after the upheaval of the last ten minutes, she wanted to say yes. It was totally possible they wouldn’t be standing in that spot, wouldn’t have been in Texas at all, if Wells hadn’t been honest with Buck about Josephine’s circumstances. He’d done what was necessary to get them on the track to making money. But after struggling every day of her life to be seen as capable on her own, the whole thing smarted. Badly. She was mad and helpless and sick over what her parents were thinking. And she just needed to step back for a while.

“I don’t think that’s a good idea right now,” she answered, finally, her throat burning.

His chest rose fast and fell faster. “Come here, Josephine.” He took a measured step in her direction. “Kiss me and tell me if you still believe that.”

She backed up a pace, holding up her hand to stop him from coming any closer, as much as she wanted to do the opposite. With every cell in her body, she wanted to plant her face between his pecs, let him wrap his arms around her, and weather the storm together. Her irritation and worry and humiliation prevented her, though. “I think skipping the tournament in DR is good timing, because it’ll give us a while to let the story diedown.” Swallowing took an effort. “We’ll regroup and be ready for California.”

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