Page 103 of In The Game

Within fifteen minutes, Arthur is happily sitting on one of the barstools with a couple chocolate chip cookies and I’m having the time of my life listening to Barrett stories.

“No, Barrett was a fairly normal kid. My other son used to get in trouble for trying to bait seagulls on the playground though.”

My cookie pauses on the way to my mouth. “Pardon?”

She nods while swallowing. “Paul would save some of his lunch and shove it in his pockets. Then, when he went out for recess, he’d use the food to try to lure seagulls.”

I finish swallowing the bite from my third delicious cookie.

“What was his plan if he ever caught one?”

“Oh, he caught one! He wrapped a string around its neck like a leash. Do you have any idea what it’s like signing an incident report that your child almost hung a seagull trying to take it for a walk?”

We’re cackling over a glass of wine at the kitchen table when Barrett finally hustles inside.

She places her hand on my arm. “Barrett, she’s lovely. And one smart cookie too.” Her love language must be words of affirmation or something. She barely knows me, but she’s been complimenting me nonstop since we were introduced. She slides the container of chocolate-chip heaven over to him. “Speaking of…Here, have a couple.”

Before he takes any, he bends over and whispers in my ear, “You good? If you want me to get her out of here, ask me for a glass of water.” Like we need some secret code around his mom. I love that he’s checking in on me and making sure I’m comfortable; he knows I get anxious when plans change unexpectedly. But this has turned into a fun surprise, it’s not formal or awkward. She’s welcomed me with open arms.

“No thanks, I’ve got my wine.” I smile back and he seems relieved. I tuck my feet under me and take another sip, enjoying the company of his quirky mom.

We spend the next half hour chatting before we get up to help Barrett with dinner. I chop vegetables while she shucks a few ears of corn.

“So, Arthur, how old are you?”

“I just turned five!”

“That’s wonderful! Did you have a birthday party?”

“Yeah, with koalas! That’s my favorite animal.”

“Arthur knows lots of koala facts!” Barrett cuts in. “He’s very smart.”

“Oh, I bet! Are you going to start kindergarten next year?” she asks him.

He nods emphatically.

“You’re going to love it!” She looks at me with fond eyes and taps her cheek. “You know what’s funny, his dimple reminds me so much of when Barrett was…” She looks back and forth between Barrett and Arthur.

Oh fuck. Oh fuck, oh fuck.

I drop my eyes to the vegetables I’m chopping. I’m ashamed, I’m embarrassed.

Looking to escape what must be accusing glances, I turn to wash my hands in the sink while my mind spirals. God, this woman probably hates me. She thinks I kept her grandchild from her.Shit! What if she says it out loud and Arthur hears!

“Five years,” she mutters. I spin back around to see Barrett grimacing while making a subtle slicing motion near his neck.

She takes a big gulp of air and presses her hand to her cheek.

Barrett gives a swift nod of confirmation. Our story is tangled and twisted, it makes my cheeks burn with shame. I knew a day would come when we would need to tell his family. Barrett pulls me into his side and presses a kiss to my hair. “It’s okay.”

“And he doesn’t…?”

“No,” we say in unison.

She looks back at him and tears swell in her eyes. “So he’s… Oh my God, he’s so beautiful! He’s perfect.”

“Easy, Mom…”

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