Page 38 of From the Ashes

Joey looks down to his white briefs and back up to his face with a shrug. “Five-minute blow job?”

I laugh as Cain opens his eyes wide like he wasn’t expecting that.

I was.

Rodberg grins and starts walking toward the door as Joey laughs, following behind. I can’t believe he will walk through the halls in just his briefs. But I guess he does have the body of a God to show off, so he can get away with it. They walk out of the apartment, and I shake my head, turning to look at Cain, who stares down at me, still a stunned expression on his face.

“Is she really going to give him a blow job?”

Nodding, I sigh. “Probably.”

He shakes his head and takes my hand, leading me toward his room. My muscles tense, and he exhales. “I won’t initiate anything like that between us. You need to get over the demons inside your head before we go down that path again. But right now, I need to get this blood off you… so I’d like to have a shower with you. Or you can shower alone if you don’t want me with you, but either way, I can’t see you covered in red anymore.”

I nod, following him into his room, then the bathroom, where he makes sure to lock the door. The last thing we want is for Iron Rod to come waltzing in, and we all know he wouldn’t have any qualms about doing just that.

Cain turns to me as I reach down to the hem of my dress and pull it over my head. I don’t have any panties on, we know why, but my strapless bra is still in place as he looks at me and weakly smiles, not moving a muscle. I reach behind my back, undo it, and let it fall to the floor with my dress, standing before him naked. He looks over my body, and his brows furrow. I wonder why until I look down at the bruises covering my thighs.

I sigh as I grab his jacket and pull it off him. A look of relief covers his face when he realizes I want him to shower with me. He helps me undress him, and soon we’re both naked.

Cain’s body is a masterpiece, and even though his knuckles are covered in blood, he still looks great. He leans past me into the shower and turns on the water, adjusting it to the right temperature.

I haven’t had a chance to really look at Cains’s ink before, but now I can truly take in the artwork on his back. It takes up literally his entire back. It’s black and gray, so lifelike and intricate, but I hardly have time to study everything before he leads me into the shower.

His hands run up my arms, comforting me as he steps behind me. The water cascades between my breasts, and it actually feels soothing as the heat takes away the bitterness from the cool air. Cain, behind me, presses his body against my back, and I feel every inch of him, but in no way is he making this sexual. I don’t think I could handle that right now. His hands smooth up and down my arms as he collects water and pushes it over my skin.

Closing my eyes, I enjoy the sensations washing over me. It’s nice not to feel overwhelmed. The past twenty hours… hell, I’ve felt indescribably terrible the past three weeks.

It’s good to feel comfortable.

It’s great to have him back.

I turn in his grip, the hot water flowing over my back and wetting the tips of my hair. I look up into his eyes while he stares down into mine. “We have so much we have to talk about,” I murmur, and he nods.

“I know.”

Leaning up slightly, I press my lips to his tenderly. He kisses back, but the kiss has no urgency, pressure, or domination—just a soft, almost reserved action to his affection. I slowly pull back and chew on my bottom lip, and sigh. “You won’t hurt me, Cain.”

“I feel like I already have.”

Furrowing my brows, I wrap my arms around his neck and look deep into his mesmerizing blue eyes that are so full of anguish. “How?”

“If I fought harder, if we were already back together, or if I had let you go in the beginning…” He pauses. “If things were different, you wouldn’t have been there last night, and he wouldn’t have—”

“Stop! He wasn’t there because of you. You had no control over his actions. This is not your fault, Cain.”

His jaw clenches, and he grits his teeth. “You’re just so fucking innocent in all of this, Makaylie. I want to do the right thing. I know what Ishoulddo. I know what everything in my head is screaming at me to do. So why can’t I do it?”

Shaking my head, I sigh. “Cain, I don’t…”

He rests his forehead against mine and clenches his eyes shut. “I fucking love you. You’re a weakness, and I don’t know how long I can keep this under control.”

Running my hands through the back of his hair, I assess his pain-riddled face as it scrunches tight, trying to understand him but falling short. “Cain, I don’t know what you’re trying to fight, but I’m here. I’m not going anywhere. I love you too.”

His eyes open, and he looks right into my soul, his eyes burning with intensity. I’m just not sure what’s behind it.

“I want to keep you safe. Just know that everything I do, everything I say, is in order to do just that.”

I exhale. I guess last night must have shaken him much more than I first thought. “Cain, I’m okay. I promise. I know what you walked in on last night must have scared the fuck out of you, and I can’t thank you enough for saving me, but things like that don’t happen all the time. In fact, I’m sure that’s a once-in-a-lifetime occurrence. I’m safe. I’m with you. Nothing is going to happen to me.”

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