Page 13 of Livewire Witch

It feels like a toxic spill is erupting out of me. I don’t know exactly where the words or the vitriol come from, but they come up anyway. “Maybe she’s used to squalor, but Seb doesn’t deserve to be in a place like this.”

“No one does.” A familiar female voice rings out behind us.

We spin around to see Silver, looking pale-faced, exhausted and dirty, with Seb and Fabian behind her. I’m not blind to the spark of hurt that’s clear in her expression.

Fuck.

I’ve never wanted to shove words back inside me more. Too bad I can’t unsay them or turn back time and be less of a prick.

So much for avoiding feelings. Or for our touching reunion. My chest squeezes and my heart pounds just at the sight of her.

So many mixed feelings rise inside me. I don’t know what to do with them and I can feel my control slipping already. Disgustat this place. Relief at seeing the three of them unharmed. I’m hollowed out by the mixture of hope and barely masked pain in Silver’s expression.

I have an almost desperate urge to scoop her up, to drag her into my arms and comfort her, even though I’m one of the causes for her hurt at this moment. Her pain and vulnerability draws me in and I’m back to being a child, trying to protect a woman I care about.

In the city above us, I hear the telltale crack of thunder that’s a sign of me losing my hold on my emotions.

I hold even tighter to their reins, my hand going to the scars down my left-hand side—the results of me losing control entirely that last time I tried to protect someone. The space where my kidney once sat seems to pulse inside me.

Pushing down the guilt Silver’s expression evokes in me, I turn away from her and focus my attention on Fabian and Seb. I need to keep a lid on my emotions. Keep control, and if the only way I can do that is to keep some distance, that’s exactly what I’ll do.

4

Silver

Someone needs to slap a caution sign on me since I’m about ready to implode.

The top two emotions jostling for position seem to be relief and anxiety, although they’re also having to share space with sheer fucking exhaustion. I’m so damn relieved to see some familiar faces in this hellhole. And even though Ember assured me that things would be fine, I’m uncertain how things stand between me and the mages right now.

All those feelings are overshadowed by the surge of irritation and hurt after hearing Z’s judgmental words.

Like I’d elected to come down here and subject other people to this place if I had any other choice.

“Nice to hear you still think so much of me,” I snip.

“Fuck, I didn’t mean—”

Z has the decency to look a teensy bit remorseful as he cuts himself off with a little growl of frustration.

I saved two of his buddies’ lives and he still seems to think I’m trash.

Then again, I could probably save the world from marauding fire demons, and he’d still hate me.

Normally, I’d be okay with that. It’s how the two of us are. Push and pull. He’s an ass and I call him out on it. Sometimes, there are moments of sun creeping out from the heavy cloud he lives behind, and he shows himself to be remarkably sweet. Butright now, I’m so tired I could fall over. I feel like someone’s cored my body out and I ache all over, like I’m about to come down with a heavy flu. I don’t have the emotional bandwidth to deal with harsh words.

Luckily, Ro and Zeph shift their attention away from me as my eyes sting, and my throat goes tight.

Fuck. I haven’t actually cried yet while we’ve been down here. I’ve been close to it the entire time, but I can’t believe I’m so close to finally losing it.

Fabian and Seb are both swept up into bone-breaking hugs while I cling to the wall and quietly eye the four of them. Zeph’s the largest of all of them, standing taller and bulkier than the others. His mahogany hair looks disheveled and his short curls are standing up every which way, like he’s been running his huge hands through his hair. My tired eyes then turn to Roscoe. He’s arguably the most striking to look at out of all of them. Dark rune tattoos cover almost every inch of his body. With his black hair falling all over his forehead, almost to his shoulders, he looks like he should be in some demon rock band as their lead singer.

He certainly has the charisma for it.

“You’re both all right?”

I stand with my back to the wall, digging my fingers into the dirt like it’s going to keep me grounded.

The way they both inspect Seb and Fabian, like they’re checking for signs of damage, sends an ache through my chest. As though I’d let anything happen to either of them.

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