Page 109 of Outlaw Witch

Theycouldboth have made it up here, but Roscoe passed out before midnight. And Zeph’s leg is broken, and I know we can’t risk him coming up here. I need everyone up here to make a run for it if I turn into a feral beast if we can’t lift the curse.

It’s bad enough that Silver and Seb will be in the firing line. Over the past few days, I’ve had a fuckload of nightmares starring my curse-mangled body, turning monstrous and tearing the two of them apart.

It’s led to me waking up sweat soaked and shivering. And I can’t get the images of their bloodied and broken bodies out of my head.

Fuck. I can’t let it get that far.

I’d rather throw myself off this roof first.

Or I’ll just get Silver to stop my heart.

... can’t say which out of the two would be less traumatic for everyone involved.

“Are we ready for take two?” Silver asks with a nervous little smile.

I guess now’s as good a time as any.

“We’re losing moonlight hours here,” Seb says, clapping his hands together and then wincing. “Fuck, it’s cold. My fingers feel like they might snap off any minute.”

“Let’s do this then. Just... Seb, a word before we start?” I jerk my head to one side and wait as he drags his feet over to me with pure teenage hesitation.

Once I’ve explained to him what I need him to do, his eyes widen, and he clutches my wrist.

“What? Is that seriously why I’m here?” he hisses, staring at me in horror before he moves his gaze to Silver.

“Ineedyou to do this for me, man.” I seriously can’t do it without him. And maybe I should have warned him. But he’s got a big mouth at the worst times and I couldn’t trust that he wouldn’t blab to Silver.

Just knowing what I’m about to do makes my stomach twist until I feel like I might puke. That, plus the bone-deep exhaustion and the cold, make me want this night to be over.

But there’s a big part of me that wants to drag this shit out for as long as possible.

“Fine, man. But, uh, have you thought about what's going to happen after?”

“The curse’ll be gone,” I answer him. “Now, keep your voice down and your mouth shut about this,please.”

“You mean Silver doesn’t know?” he hisses back. “What the hell? How do you think she’s going to react when you suddenly don’t know who she is? And it’s all my fault?”

I eye her over my little brother’s shoulder, watching as she makes some final adjustments to the runes. She’s put so much time and effort into all of this, so much more than I could have ever hoped for when she first stumbled into our lives. My chest burns with unspoken emotion.

I don’t have the words to tell her exactly how I feel. That I wish I’d met her a year ago. That I wish things had been different, and I hadn’t spent the majority of our time getting to know each other with me in a sickbed.

There are so many things I want.

I want to feel her under me. I want to run my hands over her soft skin, to squeeze those curves that make my mouth water.

I want to fall asleep with her beside and wake up with my face buried in her hair. I want to wakeherup with my face buried in her cunt.

To have days spent together laughing. Coffee dates and cozy Saturdays. The inside jokes, the arguments that push us apart for a short time, only for us to be drawn back together like magnets. Inexplicably connected.

I want it all. All the futures. All the nows.

But it seems fate has fucked us both without sufficient preparation. You’d think that the way that Silver’s life has turned out so far, the shit she’s faced already, would be enough preparation.

It’s not though.

To save myself, to save my brother. To save this entire district from going under, I have to make a sacrifice.

And I’ve decided that the sacrifice is her.

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