Page 70 of Papers Don't Lie

She nods and tears stream down her cheek. Her head falls on my chest, and I circle her with my arms, planting my chin on her hair. “I feel for you too,” Esmeray whispers, her shoulders shaking. “That’s why it hurts so much knowing that I’ve done this to you.”

Guilt stabs at my chest, and I have to fight for a breath, hating to see her this way. She’s the only one who’s brought some light to my life. She can’t be serious about my sleepless nights being her fault.

“You are not responsible for what I do, Ray. Remember that. And if it makes a difference, I don’t regret my decision a bit.”

Esmeray sniffles, breaking away a bit to look at me. I lift a finger, wiping her tears. “You don’t?” I shake my head. “Even after so many sleepless nights? Constant stress and threats?”

“I wouldn’t regret my decision even if it ended with me dead.”

THIRTY-EIGHT

KAI

“It’s actually so cute to see the merciless Kai Graves nervous.” Kiaran slaps me on my back as I struggle to get my tie done.

Esmeray helping the designers with my suit turned out so fucking good. To my surprise, it’s not purple, it’s black with little gold details that give the entire outfit a regal touch. She is really good at this, and I’m genuinely wondering if she’s ever considered being a designer. If it’s something that she’d like to do, I’d be more than happy to guide her the best I can and find her the best mentors in the world.

“We’ll see when you get married." I watch my brother in the mirror, raising a brow at him.

What my brothers don’t know is that I’m not nervous. I’m tired after another night when my brain decided I don’t get a break, not even before my wedding. I know Esmeray didn’t sleep either because when I got up to take a shower, she washed me like that time when I got drunk.

Neither of us are happy, but we’re definitely closer. Something shifted between us, and as hard as last night was to get through, we still woke up with a smile on our lips.

Kiaran shakes his head, stepping in his dark blue suit in front of me and taking my hands away from the tie. “You shake like a shit,” he murmurs and ties it in a second.

I don’t say anything because he’s right. If they notice, then there’s no wonder she did too.

We have two more hours before we’ll see each other, and I’m waiting for that to happen so I don’t feel like everyone knows what’s truly happening to me.

And because I’m curious about the dress she chose to wear.

Since I got to the botanical garden, Ryker has been in the same chair he was in when I came here, not once saying a word. He’s had plenty of opportunities to join our conversation, but besides a few expressions on his face, he gave nothing away.

“Is Ryker okay?” I murmur to Tristan, knowing that if they live in the same house, he should know more than I do.

His dark eyes look into mine as he threads a hand through his hair, shrugging at me. “I guess. He won’t talk about it. But don’t worry about it. The only thing you have to worry about is not passing out when you see your wife.”

I smirk, watching Ryker from the corner of my eyes. He notices me staring, but he only gives me a lift of his chin. I look away and let Kiaran arrange my hair for the fourth time at my request, the time passing too slowly.

“Mom’s here.” Ryker says his first words, and my head snaps to him.

“What?”

He nods, and I glance at my other two brothers, questioning them with my gaze. Kiaran takes a step back, and Tristan comes to stand next to him, placing his palms in his pockets, while both of them look into the ground like guilty kids.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” I ask.

Kiaran sighs. “It’s your big day, and you’re nervous enough as it is like you haven’t taken a shit in days. We wanted to tell you, really.”

“I’m surprised she’s even here. Did you invite her?” Tristan asks.

I shake my head. There’s only one person who would invite her without my permission, and that’s my dad. I know she’s sick, and I know she begged us to meet her again a year ago, but it’s not our fault we can’t forgive her for leaving when things got tough. Ryker’s illness was a hard halt to pass for all of us, especially for him, but leaving when your child is hurting and at such a young age is unforgivable.

Unlike Ryker, I spent a lot of time with our mother. I got to know what a mom is like and how maternal love feels, but all he got were blamings and cold shoulders.

She should know better than to show up.

“I’ll go get Lacey so we make sure they don’t run into each other,” Kiaran says, and I nod.

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