Page 148 of Surrender

From who?

I remember the other night when he woke me up with his hand around my throat and fire in his eyes because I said Dylan’s name in my sleep.

A normal guy might never believe I’d have a romantic fuck to give about Dylan after what he did to me last year, but Silvan knows I’m living withhimafter whathehas done to methisyear.

Silvan might be convinced.

It’s a mean thing to do, but he’s done plenty of mean things.

Besides, I won’t let it drag on.

If he comes home pissed and fucks me like he does when I’ve pissed him off… well, I’ll let him do that first, but once he confronts me about Dylan, I’ll confronthimabout the spy pens and reassure him that nothing is going on.

I don’t want to play games like these. If we’re going to be in a relationship, I want to know he trusts me. Maybe we need to talk about it. I guess we haven’t really defined our relationship.He just keeps doing insane things like trying to impregnate me, marry me, and move me in with him.

We’ll have hot sex and then we’ll have the talk and I’ll tell him I don’t want him spying on me anymore. If he wants to be my boyfriend, then he should act like a boyfriend—nota warden.

I pick up the pen and click it, then I start jotting down notes from this page of my textbook.

After a few minutes, when it feels natural, I put the pen down and grab my cell phone.

“Hello?” I pause briefly, then look over my shoulder even though I’m alone since that’s what I feel my character would do. “Why are you calling me? I told you Silvan moved me in with him. You can’t do that anymore.” I pause again, trying to think where to take this since I’m fully winging it. “No, Dylan, I cannotmeet youtonight. Are you crazy? Look, if you want to talk, you’ll have to text me during school hours. He’s a senior, and we have different majors, so we don’t have any of the same classes. You can’t text me when I’m at his place, though. It’s too risky.”

That last line is almost too much, and I don’t want to tip my hand, so I decide to end my call with pretend Dylan.

“Look, I have to go. I have homework, and he could be home any minute.” I pause briefly. “Yeah, I’ll talk to you later. Bye.”

I tap the screen to end my pretend call, then put the phone down.

My heart races a bit now that it’s done. There’s no taking that back.

I have to know, though. One way or the other.

Chapter Thirty-seven

Sophie

When Silvan gets home, I’m not sure what to expect.

It’s evening and already dark outside.

I feel a little jumpy so I’m up off the couch and heading for the kitchen to greet him like an eager pup when its owner gets home.

My eagerness is less excitement he’s here, though, and more anxiety about how he’ll respond—ifhe’ll respond—to what I did earlier.

I don’t know how the whole spy pen, watching my every move thing works. He has school and his own shit to do, so does he spy on me in real time, or is it something he’ll review later? He may not have heard the phone call yet.

I search his face for some sign of anger. He isn’t looking at me, though. He’s busy putting down the stuff he brought home.

He sets a bottle of wine on the counter and starts unpacking a paper bag full of groceries.

“What do we have here?” I ask, eyeing up the fresh pack of cage-free chicken and package of fresh pasta on the counter.

“Groceries. I bought stuff to make dinner.”

“Ooh. What are we having?”

“I don’t know. You’ll have to look at what I bought and see what we can make with it.”

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