Page 135 of Surrender

I guess I didn’t really get myself into it.

All I did was go to a stupid party.

I knew going to parties was a shitty idea.

I’m never going to a party again.

I get into the car where at least I feel safe. Silvan joins me and wraps an arm around me, pulling me into his arms. As soon as the door is shut, he asks, “Are you okay?”

“Yeah.”

“What did he say to you?”

“That he’s a murderer. Some other stuff, but… that part stuck.”

“Jesus. Well, I didn’t want to share anything I shouldn’t, but if he told you himself, I guess it’s okay. I’m sure this goes without saying, but…”

“I won’t say anything. I’m not trying to get your murdery dad after me.”

His lips curve up faintly and he brushes my hair back. “Good. I also don’t want my murdery father after you. No way that ends well.”

Tell me about it.

His threats echo in my memory. He doesn’t even know me, and somehow, he zeroed in on my biggest fears to tailor threats around them.

Silvan is observant, too.

Like father, like son, I guess.

Silvan asks if I want to go to my dorm or my mom’s house. I don’t feel like there’s a right answer.

I don’t want to have to talk to my mom right now, but I want to be alone most of all and while there’s a chance she couldbe out or I can slip by her with an excuse about homework or being tired, I share a bedroom with three other girls. There is no shot in hell I’ll be alone in my dorm.

He takes me to my mom’s house. My car isn’t there, so he tells me he’ll send Hugh to pick me up for school in the morning. I don’t want him to come inside because I’m not ready to introduce him to my mom, but he insists on walking me to the door.

We stop under the porch light. He pulls me in for another hug, and when we part a bit, he still cradles my head in his hand and looks down at me.

“I’m sorry my dad traumatized you.”

I shrug. “I’ll get over it.”

He shakes his head and caresses my face with his thumb. “I hated the way you looked at me back there. I wasn’t handing you over to fend for yourself. I hope you know that. I just know our life will be a lot easier with his approval, and he needed to see for himself that you’ll…”

“Cover your ass?”

He nods. “Yeah.”

“And what if I wouldn’t?”

“Well, then I wouldn’t have left you with him.”

Those men outside resurface in my mind. The call at dinner. The threats he made.

Would he have handed me off to them right there?

My chest starts to feel tight as my imagination travels further down that road. I picture myself ripped from Silvan’s arms, ripped from life as I know it in a much scarier way than when Silvan was the one stealing me.

Maybe he’s a lunatic, but it sure could be worse.

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