Page 88 of In Her Own Rite

“Still?” I ask, looking up. Our conversation was three days ago now, and I haven’t been able to get it out of my head. Every day that I’m working on that arch at the workshop, every time I’m in the gym, I’m thinking about what she said.I hope Emerson’s okay, in that mocking, goading voice.

“Still,” Sigur nods.

“I should talk to her again.” Instinctively I look to Saga, as if for permission. “If she wants to talk, maybe she would share more information without an agreement.”

“If we’d do that, we need a plan,” she says, shaking her head. “And we shouldn’t leave it to our most junior pack elder. Perhaps Sigur or Ivo, the professionals. Or myself or Viggo.”

Sigur shakes his head. “I tried. She refuses to talk to us. Only Kieran.”

“But why?” asks Viggo.

Because you guys are trying to starve them out, and at least I kept my promise, I think.

“Let me talk to her again,” I repeat. “I can use Viggo’s idea. Food, water, something small to trade. It could be important.”

Isolde, usually quiet in pack council meetings, shakes her head. “To learn why they came here?”

“I mean, yeah, but more importantly, to learn if there are more of them hiding out,” I say. “We can’t have caught them all. Someone in their group must know the Fakaris well, for them to have stayed hidden so long. If there are more of them hiding, what Thalia shares with us could save lives.”

Heimig shakes his head. “There are former Fakari people on the south islands who could have prepared them without coming along for the trip. Even a map could account for them hiding. I see no reason to believe there’s more of them. It’s been almost a week since the last attack.”

“And how long was it between that one and the one before?” I ask. “Let me talk to her. If any harm comes to another pack member and we could have stopped it, I’ll never forgive myself.”

Saga shakes her head slightly, the move barely perceptible, and I find myself growing agitated.

“I told you she knew Emerson’s name,” I add, this time speaking directly to her. “I need to make sure she’s not in harm’s way. Why can’t we justtry?”

Saga meets my gaze.

“Every time we speak with them without a plan of what we’re willing to trade, we put ourselves in a position to be manipulated. And any step we make towards allyship with this woman is a step closer to offering her a place on the islands. We cannot do that without thinking through the consequences.”

“You’re overthinking this,” I say.

“No, I’m thinkingthroughthis.” Her voice is corrective, like a schoolteacher, and I feel my wolf grow defensive. “And that is the job of the council. If the elder Nayakka truly had good intentions, she would tell us what she knew as an act of goodwill and hope for our mercy. The fact that she won’t, and that she’s the only one of the group to have harmed a pack member, tells me she’s not trustworthy. For all you know, she’ll tell you false information just to make things worse.”

I grit my teeth. “Why can’t we fucking try?” I snap. “What’s the harm in asking? Do you really want another pack member to get hurt? Are you willing to sacrifice Emerson’s safety so you can stew in indecision? Think about the people youlove, Saga.”

“Don’t you dare speak to me that way,tekanni,” she spits, her eyes glinting gold. I can see her wolf in there, prowling under the surface, and my own wolf sits up. “You’re worried about harm coming to Emerson, I know. Butall I dois sit here and think about the people I love. I have lost a brother and a husband, each of whom sat on this council with me before you were evenborn. And right now, my only son is on another island to stay away from the prisoner you are so eager to trade with,igaa.”

Pup.I swallow, her words hitting me like a slap.

“So yes,” she continues. “I think abouteachloved one I’ve lost, and am at risk of losing, as we make a decision. And I think about the many people on these islands whose fates are in our hands, who we are supposed to protect with our choices. I cannot make this decision for your sake, or Emerson’s. My role as an elder is to think aboutall of us. As is yours.”

Frustration rolls through me. I can’t help but feel like we’re sitting here, wasting time that we could be spending solving an actual problem.

“We’re nearing the end of the meeting time,” says Wim, our council secretary, from the corner of the room. “Should we bring it to a vote?”

I nod wordlessly and Heimig leads the call. 29 in favor of me talking to Thalia again, in the hopes of a negotiation; 31 against.

I glance at the empty place where Seb would be sitting, a few seats over from Saga. His vote wouldn’t have made the difference, but he’s a better speaker than I am. I can’t help but wonder how it would have gone if he were here.

Heimig brings an end to the meeting, and I get up with everyone else. I see Saga heading towards me, probably to make it right and invite me to dinner, but I don’t want to talk. Instead, I head for Wim.

“Aftnu’kut,” he says, looking up from his laptop. “How did you feel about your first council meeting?”

“Yeah, fine,” I say, nodding. “Council records are available to any pack council member, right?”

His brow furrows. “Sure. What do you need?”

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