Page 105 of Reputation (Tempt)

I had no real claim to Nate. And even if I had, pretending to have sex with a costar was part of his job. Yet it pained me to imagine Nate with anyone else.

I watched as Nate strode toward his costar, emanating charisma. He was magnetic, and everyone on set was attuned to him. Glued to his every move as if under a spell.

I could see why. He’d always captivated me, and he definitely did the character of Brock Ransom justice. Then again, Nate had always been the star of my every romantic fantasy. I thought of all the times I’d watched a movie with Nate starring in it. All the times I’d fantasized about him. All the other countless fans who had done or would do the same thing.

But it was different now that I was with Nate. Now that I… I shook my head. Sex scenes. Fans. It all hit differently.

This was exactly why I’d wanted to avoid sleeping with him in the first place. I told myself I’d gotten caught up in the moment. In the idea of being his fiancée. In the way he looked at me, treated me. Hell, maybe the sex had turned my brain to mush.

Nate cupped his costar’s cheek, and I felt a twinge of jealousy. I’d known this was a possibility. The film was based on a steamy romance after all. The characters were going to have to be intimate.

It’s his job,I reminded myself.

He’s just playing a part.

I didn’t want to distract Nate or any of the performers from their work. Even if I did want to smash something.

Jackson nudged me and mouthed, “You okay?”

I smiled brightly and nodded, giving him a thumbs-up in return.God. Could I be more obvious?

But it was difficult to ignore that hum of jealousy. Watching Nate and his costar, Mila, I could see how easy it would be to fall for your costar. Nate had even dated a few of his in the past, and I could understand why. You spent a lot of time together on set. You were going through an intensely emotional experience. And it would be difficult to separate truth from fiction.

But when he leaned in, resting his forehead against hers, my jealousy was replaced by something more painful.Recognition. Because he was looking at her the same way he looked at me.

Was that all I was to him? Another costar? Another actress in his ongoing performance?

I clutched myself as if to stem the pain that accompanied this crushing realization. I’d fallen for it.Him.

Oh my god. I loved him.

I froze, feeling as if my biggest secret had not just been revealed but broadcast to the world. I glanced around to confirm I’d only uttered the words in my head, and everyone else was looking at the actors.

Shit.This wasn’t supposed to happen.

They continued filming, and I clenched my fists so hard, my nails were going to leave a mark. I was fine. I could do this.

Nate might be the award-winning actor, but I was beginning to think I could be too, with the performance I was giving. It wasn’t even about lying to friends, family, strangers, the whole world. That was becoming almost second nature, scarily enough.

It was the fact that I loved him, and I had to act like it was pretend…while we were both simultaneously pretending it was real. What a mess.

And I wasn’t fine. Watching Nate pretend to fall in love with his costar merely reminded me that his “feelings” for me were just as believable.Oh god.My heart lurched painfully in my chest. And here I’d convinced myself that I was different. That what we had…

The urge to run became nearly overwhelming. To ground myself, I tried to visualize my favorite running route. Something.Anything.

God. How long was this scene?

And why had I ever thought I could handle this?

What happens in Abu Dhabi stays in Abu Dhabi. Ha!Talk about wanting to have your cake and eat it too.

I’d been a fool to suggest that. A bigger fool to think I could separate emotions from sex when it came to Nate. Real from pretend.

What the hell am I supposed to do now?

“And cut,” the director finally called.

The entire crew seemed to release the collective breath they’d been holding. Nate shook his head as if awakening from a trance. I couldn’t imagine how emotionally taxing it was to perform his role, though I had some idea, considering the fact that I’d been pretending to be his fiancée.

---