Page 11 of Ruthless Salvation

I shrugged. “Life is better when you have a good attitude and focus on the positive. That doesn’t mean I can’t smell bull crap when it’s at my feet. I just choose to smile as I walk past it.”

“Amen to that,” Luke said with a grin. “All right, I’ll let you ladies get to your books and laundry. Come get me if you want to grab food later.”

“Will do!” we chimed in unison.

Micky and I chatted for a bit about work and the upcoming test she had to take. Hanging out with her always felt so comfortable. I realized as we were talking that I felt more at home here than I had since my parents were alive. It was such a relief to finally allow myself to get close to the people around me.

When I’d moved from Chicago six months earlier, I’d told myself if I made the move to New York, I could settle in permanently. No more moving. It had taken everything I had to leave Chicago, but knowing it would be my last move had given me the incentive I’d needed. I’d let myself stay there a full year—twice as long as I’d stayed anywhere else in the past five years—but I forced myself to start over one last time. I’d known from the beginning that I couldn’t live my life on the run forever. That sort of lifestyle had already taken a toll on me. I was ready for a home and friends and maybe even … a relationship.

The prospect filled me with excitement and dread.

I assured myself that this time I’d find a kind, affectionate man and take things slowly. Someone who was gentle and understanding. Someone the exact opposite of Torin Byrne. He’d gone from brooding to unpredictable—both were potential red flags. I knew better than anyone not to romanticize a dangerous man.

So why on earth did I still find him so alluring?

Did it matter why? He was simply not an option. If I was going to stay in Manhattan, I needed to set boundaries with him so I wouldn’t be forced to leave my home yet again. I had to convince Torin that he needed to let go of whatever interest he might have in me.

An idea started to form.

One of the few things a man like him respected was the territory of another man. Maybe having a boyfriend in the picture was all I needed to defuse the situation, even if that other man was a smokescreen. At the very least, it would help me diagnose how serious the issue was.

A cautious hopefulness filled me with energy. I had a plan, and that gave me a sense of control over this otherwise uncertain situation.

“I better get to the laundromat before all the machines are taken.” Sundays were always busy, but also, I wanted to find out if my plan was feasible.

“Yeah, and I should get to studying. Text me, though, if you need me to pop in and watch your stuff while you take a break.”

“I will, thanks!” I pulled the canvas bag from my laundry basket and situated the strap over my shoulder. “Good luck studying.” I grinned at Micky’s grimace, letting myself into the hallway. Instead of heading for the stairs, however, I knocked on Luke’s door.

He answered, a grin lighting his face. “That was quick. You need something?” Luke was such a great guy. I’d had plenty of crappy neighbors, so I knew how lucky I was to live across from him. He was also more than a little handsome.

“Just a quick question. Mind if I come in?”

“Of course not, come on in.” He stepped aside to give me and my bag room. “What’s up?”

“I have a favor to ask, and it’s a big one, so I understand if you’re not up for it.”

“Now you’ve piqued my curiosity.” He studied me with amusement.

“How would you feel about coming to the club when I get off work tomorrow and walking back home with me?” I shot him an apologetic grimace, knowing an outing at four o’clock in the morning for someone who worked regular daytime hours was a big ask.

Luke’s good humor evaporated, his features taking on a sharper edge. “You feeling unsafe at night?”

“No, not exactly. It’s kind of hard to explain. My boss worries about me, and I want to show him that he doesn’t need to. It’s a little deceptive, but I think he’ll stop worrying if he thinks I have a boyfriend.” Was that insensitive of me? I suddenly realized I hadn’t taken Luke’s feelings into account. Pretending to be my boyfriend was an entirely different ask than walking me home.

Luke wasn’t merely a good guy with a pretty face. He was also smart. His gaze narrowed to skeptical slits. “What do you mean heworriesabout you?”

“I know it sounds sketchy, but it’s not.” I infused my stare with earnest sincerity—a trait I’d perfected in high school when I’d needed to fudge the truth to my parents. “He’s talking about cutting my hours back so I don’t have to walk home quite so late, but I need those hours. Some of the best money gets spent in those early morning hours.”

Why didn’t I tell Luke the truth?

Because he’d worry, and because sharing my problems with him made things complicated. When a person opens themselves up like that, they leave themselves vulnerable. I preferred to handle things on my own. My way.

If the situation changed, I could always come clean later when I truly needed help, but I wasn’t to that point yet.

He didn’t look totally convinced but didn’t push the matter. “Yeah, I’m happy to help. You know I’m here for you anytime.”

I beamed up at him. “Thanks, sugar.” I gave him a grateful hug. “’Kay, this thing’s getting heavy. I’ll shoot you a text later.”