Page 108 of Untether

In a nutshell, this entire thing is fucking insane, and my only two options are to do a one-eighty so fast I get whiplashor to lean in and trust Cal to help me build a workable, practical structure around these crazy feelings we have for each other.

Cal ends our kiss with a gentle tug on my lower lip before resting his forehead to mine. ‘Can I tell you some of my wishes?’

‘Sure,’ I whisper, luxuriating in the feel of his thick hair between my fingers.

‘They’re for down the line, not tonight, so don’t freak out,’ he says, and I hum my acknowledgement. It seems I’m not the only one spiralling headlong into the future.

‘But I wish for a time where I don’t have to leave after dinner,’ he says. ‘I want to be able to climb into this tub with you and take you to bed afterwards. And yeah, I realise that also means I help you put the boys to bed, and that one epic game of Gorilla Tag doesn’t earn me the right to do that yet, but I’d like to try to earn it.’

‘I’d like that,’ I murmur, my thumb stroking the skin at the back of his neck, tentative hope coursing through my veins.

‘Yeah? Good,’ he says softly.

I take a deep breath. ‘I realise it’s very early in this… relationship. And I don’t want all the steps we haven’t taken to detract in any way from what I just said to you. Because I mean it. But I also recognise we have a long way to go.’

‘So you’re basically telling me you’re gagging to be my girlfriend?’ he asks, and I laugh, because that’s such a Cal thing to say.

‘I am literally begging for it,’ I say.

‘Yeah, I can tell. So I passed my audition, then?’

‘You nailed it so hard. Harder than anyone’s ever nailed it.’ I move my face so I can drag my lips over his beard.

‘I’ll nailyouso hard.’

‘You’d better.’

‘I will. I’ll come over as soon as you get those little chimps off to school tomorrow.’

‘Glad to hear it.’

He pauses. ‘Just so I have an idea… do you think you’ll talk to them at some point? About us?’

I’ve been thinking about this all evening. ‘Yeah. I should probably talk to them tonight, after you’ve gone.’

‘Good idea. I’m riding high on the Gorilla Tag bribery right now. We should close the deal while the momentum is in my favour,’ he says, and I laugh.

‘Absolutely. Make the bribery work for us.’

‘Right?’ He pauses again. ‘How do you think they’ll take it?’

‘I honestly have no idea,’ I tell him, and it’s true. ‘I know they’ll like you—how could they not? But they’ve also had a shitty year. That said, Pip’s been pretty protective of me. So if I have a new, um, boyfriend who makes me happy, I’m hoping that’s something they can get behind.’

‘That’s something we can all get behind,’ he says. ‘I don’t want to rush any of you, but I also don’t want to sneak around. You should know I don’t give a shit who sees us or what photos they publish, but obviously I want to make sure you’ve had whatever chats you need to with the boys before we get outed.’

‘I’ll talk to them,’ I promise. ‘I need to talk to theParadiseteam too and get our message straightened out.’

‘What’s the problem?’ he asks.

I sigh. ‘Messaging. They think my entering into another monogamous relationship isn’t the right way to end the documentary, optically speaking. It’s not… radical enough.’

His mouth twists. ‘Fuck’s sake. If they saw the stuff weget up to together, they’d change their tune. So what do they want?’

‘They’ve got the footage. I mean, those reshoots from last week look incredible—exactly what we wanted. It’s more my voiceover. I need to lock myself in my study and figure it out. We’ve got this one opportunity to pack a punch, you know? And I don’t know yet what that punch will be.’

‘If they think you and I being together is too boring and predictable a note to end the show on,’ he says, ‘then we’d better show them they’re wrong, hadn’t we?’

‘What do you mean?’

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