Page 14 of City of the Dead

The judge waved him off. “What were you saying, Ms. Ettinger?”

Ettinger rubbed her palms together. “During the recess you so graciously granted, Your Honor, we did some background research on Mr. Slope’s allegedexpertand found her to be anythingbut.Herallegeddoctoral degree is from an uncertifiedcorrespondenceschool, herallegedexperience in the field of child clinical or pediatricpsychologyor any variant of such isnonexistentand in fact, last year, she was brought up on charges ofmisrepresentation—”

Slope’s cheeks inflated. “Not relevant. Dr. Gannett knows my client well and has substantive information.”

“She knows your clientquitewell,” said Ettinger, “because she had an intimaterelationshipwith him.”

Like a horny pigeon, Slope puffed his chest and upped the volume of his squawk. “Exactly, Lara!Intimate.Derived from the Latinintimatus,meaning ‘to make familiar.’ That is our goal here—your goal, I’m sure, Your Honor. Making thetruthfamiliar rather than leaving it as a hazy abstraction. I posit, Your Honor, that in matters of child welfare, familiarity ishighlyrelevant and that Dr. Gannett is in a unique position to shed light on my client’s interpersonal merits—”

Ettinger smirked. “Iposit that familiarity can breed contempt, Your Honor. Which is precisely what Mr. Slope has shown this court and these proceedings by attempting to foist a charlatan on a profoundly serious—”

Slope gun-aimed a finger. “You. Are. Veering dangerously close to slander.”

“Quite the contrary, Forrest. I’m speaking truth to the abuse of power.”

The judge, looking shell-shocked, said, “Let’s reconvene in a week.”

The following day, the father relinquished his custody claim.

—

Milo said, “Because of Gannett?”

“I’m sure that was part of it,” I said. “But he also got his ex to write him a check for half the gym’s worth and he really didn’t care about the kid in the first place.”

“Sentimental fellow. So my victim was a big-time fraud.”

“And a big-time risk-taker,” I said. “Imagine trying that after being brought up by the state board for practicing without a license.”

“How’d that resolve?”

“She pled no contest, promised not to repeat, was let off with a warning. A few months later she was on the Web selling herself as a relationship expert.”

“No restrictions on that?”

“Nope.”

He stuffed his hands in his pockets, thought for a few seconds. “I can see a gambler letting a naked guy enter in the middle of the night. How’d you figure out she was phony?”

“I didn’t, it was luck. A few weeks before, I’d heard about her from a colleague. One of his patients had left to see her and it ticked him off so he researched her.”

“He the one who reported her?”

“Him or someone else in a similar position,” I said. “Anyway, once I told the mother’s lawyer, she did a quick internet search out in the hall and got plenty of ammunition. Later, I was curious and did my own research. Gannett’s pre-doctoral work history was unconventional, to say the least. Figure model, nude dancer, and there were suggestions she made a porn movie though I never found evidence of that. She got a mail-in degree, hooked up with a D-list actor, and began inserting herself into the almost-celebrity circuit.”

“Sounds like perfect training for a relationship expert. Which actor?”

“Don’t recall.”

“Shame on you, son. This is L.A., where are your priorities?” Out came his hands, fingers restless, like typing without a keyboard. “So maybe the neighbor was onto something and she hadn’t left the other stuff totally behind.”

“Or,” I said, “she chose the wrong relationship to coach.”

—

Despite the lack of activity in the bedroom, I asked to see it, so we climbed the awkward staircase. The steps and the landing were carpetedand clean, as was Cordi Gannett’s sleeping chamber, a modest, dim rectangle set up with a low queen bed in a bamboo box-frame. A quilted coffee-colored spread showed no sign of disturbance but for a turned-up corner. Red velvet slippers sat in front of a nightstand bearing nothing but a gooseneck lamp.

Meticulous woman but maybe not about the things that mattered?

---