Page 50 of Careless

Francine is my sister. I’ve always liked her, and she said just yesterday that she considers me a friend, too.

I sit on the porch and hug my knees to my chest, praying I don’t start crying again. The screen door creaks open and the porch groans in protest under the weight of my visitor.

I look up as Finn takes a seat next to me, silence surrounds us. I’m not sure if I want it or if I’d rather hear what he has to say. However, I need to know, does he still think of me as his sister? I don’t know if I can ask, but I need to say something.

“Francine can’t know about this,” I say and he stiffens at my pronouncement. “I don’t know what he did to her, but knowing the truth will only devastate her. Let the dead bury the dead. Martin is dead. Carmen is dead. My grandfather, Nolan, is dead. The only ones alive that know the truth are Francine’s parents, Michael and Bethany. If they haven’t told her by now, they’re not going to.”

Finn carries tension in his shoulders as he nods. “Yeah, I know.” He grows silent again. “He tried to rape her when she was twelve, and after the cops took her statement, he tried to gaslight her into thinking she imagined it all. She still has nightmares about it.”

Oh, my god. Francine, no.

I thought I was out of tears, but they start anew. “What kind of man does that to his own daughter?”

“A very sick and entitled one.”

I scoff. “I just don’t understand how you can do that to family.”

A smile spreads across his face as the tension in his body relaxes. “You are my family. You’ll always be my sister, Sorcha. This doesn’t change that.”

“Ditto,” I say before accepting his hug and loving how it feels to be in his arms. “Is it weird now that you’re screwing my sister?”

We laugh together at my horrible attempt at a morbid joke. I’m too drained to think of something clever so I go with honesty. “I’m glad you two are together. She makes you happy and grounds you. You need that.” He’s also never smiled the way she makes him.

“I’m not the only one who needs to be happy. You've been really strained these past few weeks. Something is up and you’re not talking about it. I’m not going to make you tell me, but you need something that makes you happy.”

Is he about to bring up what Carmen said about Rian and me? Hopefully not. There’s only one thing stopping me from being happy, and oddly, it’s Finn and the roadblock he created for me and Rian. So I’ll just be a coward and tiptoe around the subject.

“Other people think I shouldn’t have what will make me happy, that it will stir things up too much.” That’s the best way I can put it without giving it away.

“Fuck what other people think. If you need something, you go out and get it. Everything else will fall in line.”

If this isn’t a sign, I don’t know what is.

“I know we’re having a little heart to heart—”

“Got somewhere you need to be, sis?”

“Something like that.”

He nods with a smile. “Don’t let me stop you from being happy.”

I look into the eyes of my brother for a moment, just thankful that I can still call him that, that I still have him. Then, I let his words hit me in the stomach like a divine intervention.

I need to see Rian.

* * *

I’m barelyable to stay within the speed limit as I drive the short distance from my dad’s house to Mason Road, the road that both the Bastards and Kia live on, ready to confess how madly in love with Rian I am. It’s insane how this morning I was struggling to push him away and now I’m running toward him, unable to focus on anything other than talking to him, kissing him, and finally giving myself to him.

I park in the driveway behind Rian’s car and notice Eoghan’s Jeep gone, which isn’t much of a surprise. He likes to disappear.

Clicking the seat belt release button, I rip the strap off and nearly trip getting out of my car.

I’ve always needed Rian, like I need the air. I have no clue why I thought I could ignore the way I feel about him or deny my body what it craves.

Or rather, who it craves.

My heart thumps in my throat as I sprint to the front door and shove it open. The house is quiet except for the sound of the air conditioner pumping through the vent. I wouldn’t expect it to be loud, not after dealing with Carmen.

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