Page 4 of Careless

Finn sits with Rian and Colin as they laugh and talk quietly. A pretty girl is perched on his lap trying to get his attention.

“Who? Blonde McTitties over there?” Kia scoffs.

“No. Watch.” A moment later, Francine Gray turns down the hall by herself, a part of her routine through all four years of school, holding her books in her arms, blonde curls falling down her shoulders.

As if Francine was blowing a dog whistle only Finn could hear, he senses her presence. Instantly, his gaze turns from Colin and narrows in on his prey. She juggles with her belongings as she slips her yellow, light weight sweater off her shoulders to put in her locker. My brother stares at her, a look of contemplation etched across his face.

“Oh my god! Francine Gray? Isn't she dating the quarterback, whatshisname?”

“Duncan Malloy. Duncan is a nice guy, but I never see any chemistry between them. Well, at least not on Francine’s part.” I elbow her in the stomach. “Watch this and tell me if Duncan is the one that has her heart.”

“Watch what?” She scowls at me while exaggeratedly rubbing the spot where I viciously attacked her.

“This!” I hiss and nod toward Fran. She has visibly stiffened as if she senses eyes on her. She turns and faces my brother, but he has already averted his eyes. She stares at him for a long moment with more emotion than I have seen her give Duncan in the previous years, combined.

Does she know how much he watches her or is she completely oblivious? He has been doing it so often that she’d have to be blind not to see it.

She blinks several times as if to clear her thoughts before she closes her locker and walks away.

“Holy shit. What the hell is going on there?” Kia asks.

“No clue. Anytime I ran into Francine this summer, for some reason, my brother was not far behind. That can't be a coincidence. I'm inclined to think those two are having a little love affair. It's the only thing that makes sense,” I explain.

She laughs. “Unless he's stalking her,” she jokes.

“Finn isn't a stalker. He doesn’t need to stalk,” I laugh at the idea.

“Come to think of it, I think I’ve seen that look before,” Kia retorts, a sly smile stretches across her face.

Slightly distracted, I ask, “You’ve seen Finn staring at someone else?”

“Nooooo.” She laughs, “I’ve seen that look on Rian.”

Completely grabbing my attention, I need clarification. “What? You’ve seen Rian looking at Francine?”

Her laugh gets louder and she returns the elbow nudge to my gut.

“Rian looks at you the same way Finn looks at Francine. He’s doing it right now,” she tells me. She has to be teasing. When I say Kia knows everything, I literally meaneverything, including my highly unrealistic crush on my brother's best friend. It’s a pointless crush though. Not only would Rian not date his best friend's sister, he's emotionally unavailable as well as self-destructive. He finds something that makes him happy, enjoys the high for a while, then hates himself for being happy.

It's never-ending.

He wasn't always like this. He used to show his heart to the people close to him, but not since his mom killed herself. That muscle is locked down tight and nobody can reach it.

I've known Rian my whole life, and I want nothing more than to reach the little boy hidden deep inside him, but Rian won't let him out. That breaks my heart. He's stuck on pause, and I fear he’ll always be.

Regardless of thinking Kia’s wrong, my heart hammers. I know better than to hope Rian is staring at me. He’ll have a warm body in his bed tonight and I won’t even be a distant thought.

Rian has never hinted that he wants me, and I'm not going to embarrass myself again.

Rian is unattainable, not to mention my brother would kill him if he touched me. It's a miracle that I'm not still a virgin.

Finn probably thinks I'muntouched,and I'd like to keep it that way. There’s only one guy that has shown interest in me, and he wasn’t from this school.

JasonfreakingWoods.

He’s the star athlete at Carson, our rival school. Football, wrestling, baseball, soccer, Jason’s a real jack of all trades.

And I gave him my virginity.

---