Page 43 of Destroyer

And now my willie is sticking up too.

True to his word, Nico behaves like an angel while I get him downstairs across my shoulder. I sit him on the dining chair, tucking him in so the arm rests trap him in the seat. He's facing me as I work in the kitchen, but his gaze is fixed on the world outside in my garden.

“You should be reading while you're sitting there.” The phrase 'while Daddy makes your breakfast’dries out my mouth. Daddy. This isn’t me breaking him to my will, this is him breaking me. This is all his little game of manipulation and dominating the situation his way.

“Here. Eat your porridge.” I put the bowl on the table in front of him, the spoon turned towards him.

He turns his eyes up at me and opens his mouth.

“Nico.” My tone speaks a thousand words.

“It's too hard,” he grumbles.

I pity him, with his big doe eyes and that butter-wouldn't-melt expression.

“Fine.” I huff my protests as I lift the spoon and start feeding him.

“Knox is coming over later, he's bringing some things to make you more comfortable and he's going to ask some questions.”

“Not untie me. I need this.”

“I won't.”

“Fuck me. Please.”

“Nico…”

The look of utter disappointment on his face could crush the coldest of hearts. Can he not see how much I love him now, as I spoon porridge into him? Or in the way I covered up two murders to protect him?

Could it be that this poor sweet boy can't see feelings? Does he need to actually feel love to know that it is real.

“Nico, there is a rumour that your mother was a psychopath. Do you know what that means?”

“I have been called it by men who do not want to be hurt.”

“It would mean you don't feel emotions like most people do.”

“I have been told that too.”

“It's how come you can't see how much I love you. It's why you think you need to have sex to know I feel for you.”

“It is wrong to want that then?”

“No. I just didn't realise.”

“But now you do, we can have sex?”

“Nico…” I say his name as if it can explain away all my hesitations and reluctance. It's not that I don't want him, it's that we're eating breakfast.

I need this to be more spontaneous, free, and before I have a chance to second guess myself.

As my mind swirls with my own demons, Nico tumbles out of the chair. It's quite a spectacular movement for a boy who is pinned in, giving me plenty of time to grab him before he falls.

Instantly, Nico's lips are on mine, drinking me in. My hands work through his messy locks as I meet him head on.

“No.” I pull away. This is just him manipulating me again. Instead of giving him what he wants, I flip him across my lap and lower his joggers so I can see the nappy hugging his arse. Imagining him plugged and caged for this doesn't help the swelling in my cock. My slaps hit the padding of the nappy, but they are hard enough for him to feel them. He yelps with each blow, but if this is how he feels love, then he will endure what I deem appropriate. With the padding around his rear, I can safely pin him here and paddle his arse until Knox turns up with the equipment I need to keep him comfortably restrained long term.

Chapter twenty-eight

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