Page 24 of The Wrong Guy

Britney lets herself in with the key I gave her for emergencies and plops all of her stuff down. “I’m glad you called. I wanted to know what happened today. Oh, and before I forget, when did you get that gorgeous new SUV in front of her apartment?”

“Well, I will start from the beginning. First, sit with me and ensure the door is locked.”

Britney raises a perfectly shaped eyebrow at me before following my directions. “Do you think someone’s going to break in or something?”

I let her words slide before telling her everything that took place today. “I was leaving today, and I realized my window to my car was smashed in, and then my tire was slashed. I had to call Andreas-“

“By the way, your brother is really fucking hot.”

“You know that’s my twin brother? The only reason why we aren’t considered identical is because we are different genders?”

She shrugs. “Maybe I’m secretly a lesbian and want to do you.”

I throw a pillow at her. “Would’ya stop so I can tell you about what happened?”

She giggles and throws the pillow back at me. “I’m just saying I could be your sister-in-law. We could wear matching pajamas at Christmas-“

She’s cut off when I reach over to push her. “No! Andreas is not the marrying kind.”

Britney waggles her eyebrows. “Well, maybe he would be interested in being friends with benefits with me?”

“I’m done talking.”

She giggles and then stops. “Okay, okay. I’m sorry I had to get that out of my system.”

“Anyway,” I begin again by being extra by saying the way, “he came to pick me up to take me to the office. When we got there, Stavros was looking gorgeous. He got all possessive of me. Which was strange yet exciting-”

“You have a hot brother and a hot attorney… Your karmic gods are nice to you.”

“I’m getting divorced. Did you forget that? Could we stop focusing on how hot everyone is and focus on the fact that Derek is about to screw me with everything, and I kind of hooked up with my divorce attorney?” I exclaim.

I can hear her mouth open and close like a goldfish in the tank. “You’ve got to be kidding me.”

“Stavros… you know… did that to me, and I came so hard. I didn’t know I was missing that.”

Her hand raises and falls on the couch. “No way. You mean all I had to do was get divorced to meet someone hot?”

I throw something at her again. “Can we be serious? Then, I noticed a man following behind me at the gas station. Brit, I think Derek is trying to intimidate me.”

She reaches over to grab my hand. “Did you talk to Andreas about it?”

Usually, I would say something disparaging about how she just wants to talk about him, but I know she’s trying to be helpful. She knows that Andreas would help me as much as he can. I mean, he bought me a vehicle today.

“Here’s the thing: if we call him, you cannot tell him about Stavros. It is not cool if I hook up with him.”

She crosses her fingers on her chest and then raises her hand like a Girl Scouts member. I want to chuck something at her.

After calling Andreas and telling him everything, he used a couple of curse words and made some threats about wanting to kill my soon-to-be ex-husband. He hangs up with me to immediately call Stavros to talk to him about everything. I don’t get a chance to comment on how Stavros can’t help me because this is domestic, and I’m crazy. Nope.

Instead, I’m under strict orders not to leave my apartment and wait for Andreas to call me back for further instructions. I would have said something snotty to him, but I know Andreas is going to handle what’s going on.

Britney and I were trying to relax on the couch when there was stomping up the stairs and then a banging on my door. I get off the couch to check the door to see who it is. There isn’t anyone behind the door, but I open it anyway.

There’s a note sticking to my door addressed to me.

Audrina:

Do you really think it’s a good idea to fuck your divorce attorney? You don’t know anything about him. He’s very dangerous. Get out while you can.

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