Page 24 of Beautiful Beasts

“Dearly Beloved” by Daughtry

I roll over and stretch my arms out, feeling the space next to me, the cold space. I open my eyes. It is still dark, and I can’t see much, but I know he is gone. The coldness of his spot tells me that he has been gone for a while. I hate that he doesn’t say goodbye, but he isn’t used to having someone to say goodbye to.

I hate that he has to leave at all, but I will never ask him to stay. It is not my place to tell him to stay or tell him anything for that matter. This house belongs to Dante. This bed belongs to Dante. I belong to Dante.

He is trying to show me that I am different, but I can’t get the deal that Dante offered Griffin out of my head. Give me to him or die.

I knew he was going to take me anyway, and he wanted to prove to me and everyone in that room what kind of man my father truly was. But the sting is still there. The negative thoughts run through my head several times a day. I’m just another thing for a man to own and be used however he wants. Just a whore.

Fuck, why can’t I just be happy?

Why can’t I just trust that I am fucking more?

Dante is doing everything he can to show me, but the doubts flood through me like a drug—one that wants to kill me slowly as I try to run away screaming, a drug that makes me want to scream and run.

It is not my place to make him choose between being king and me. Honestly, I am afraid of what his choice would be. I am in love with him because of what and who he is and the escape he gives me. The escape he promises me. I am as much a beast as he is, just in a different way.

Dante had a life before me, and I am not stupid; he will also have a life after me.

My negative thoughts remind me every minute of every day of who I am and what this is. He has tried to convince me otherwise, and a big part of me believes him, but there is still the one part deep down inside of me that is telling me eventually, whatever this is, it will end.

I take a deep breath and roll out of bed. When I stepped out into the hallway, the house was completely quiet, letting me know it was late and everyone else was still asleep.

I have been here for almost three weeks and still feel out of place most of the time, but then there are small moments when this place feels like home. Small moments when they feel at home, but for different reasons. Harley and Dante replace the negative with safety and love. Both of them complete me and give me something different that I need and crave.

I don’t know what Harley and I are, but I want to find out. Nothing has happened between us, but the tension between us is there. The look he gives me, the way he watches me when he thinks I don’t know. I see him. I feel him. Maybe I am just crazy, and there is nothing there. Maybe he is just fucking watching me like he is because his best friend is in love with me. Maybe I feel the way I do because Dante told him to make sure I am safe.

Fuck, dark-ass motherfucking thoughts are drowning me.

If I’m being honest with myself, I don’t know what Dante and I are either. I can say he has completely taken me over in ways I never thought were possible. Dante speaks to me without fucking speaking. His hard yet loving embrace. His burning eyes look straight into my damaged fucking soul, and he accepts the broken pieces even if they are going to cut the fuck out of him.

They both confuse me. Shit, I fucking confuse myself.

I make my way to the kitchen, going to the fridge to grab a bottle of water. A dark figure stands off to the side when I close the refrigerator. My heart stopped; I lost my grip on the bottle and dropped it to the ground, water going everywhere.

I gasp when Gus speaks. “It is just me, Bella,” he says calmly.

That should bring me comfort, but it doesn’t. He doesn’t give me any comfort; if anything, he puts me more on edge because I have fucking trust issues, and he has already made it clear what he thinks of me.

“You scared the fucking shit out of me, you asshat,” I snap at him.

He smiles and shakes his head. “Sorry, I heard someone walking around, and I had to check to make sure that everything was okay,” he explains softly.

“I’m good; I just needed water,” I say, trying to hide the fear that is still coursing through me like a fucking virus.

I bend down to grab the now empty bottle from the ground, and as I stand up, Gus walks into me. He caught me off guard, and I backed away from him, but he continued to walk into me until he had me backed against the counter. He places his hands on either side of me, boxing me in.

My heart beats out of my chest when he leans into me. “You know you aren’t the first woman he has brought home,” Gus says in a low, dark voice.

I lean away from him. “I know,” I whisper as he moves his face inches from mine.

“No, I don’t think you do, Bella,” he says. His voice takes on a dangerous darkness I am all too familiar with.

“What do you want?” I ask, the fear radiating off of me in waves.

“I want you to know you are just another whore. A whore he will get sick of, a whore they will both get sick of,” Gus whispers as he runs his nose along my neck.

I don’t respond and turn my head, slamming my eyes shut as he presses his lips against my ear. “Whore’s never last long in either one of their beds. Dante is not one to share Bella. You are playing with fire,” he warns as he pulls back and looks me over. A dark, desired smile spreads across his face.

---