Page 43 of Watching Ames

* * *

Spendingtime with Alex meant being fully accepted into their ragtag group, who truly treated each other as family despite both Wren and Dev having blood families of their own, though both lived on opposite sides of the country.

“We all just kind of fit together,” Wren explained later in the week, when I stopped by her shop - aptly namedIn Bloom- for the first time, choosing to take her up on her offer to visit after my classes finished for the day. I spent the first hour exploring the shop as she dealt with customers, making a game of finding Wren’s darker inclinations - the tastes that created the floral creations I coveted so much - hidden among the traditional items throughout the store.

There was a bouquet of red roses, leaves, and greenery spilling over the edges, highlighting the hollow eyes of the skull vase they sat in. The walk-in fridge was filled to bursting with flowers, but I recognized more than a few of the flowers she had used for my bouquets. There were dark flowers that looked ink-stained, paper thin white flowers that looked almost translucent, and spiky sprays of foliage alongside the sunflowers and red roses.

She plucked flowers of the former type as I stood shivering behind her, sticking the flowers in a bucket I held until it was filled. She directed me to set the bucket next to the front counter before moving toward the wall of vases behind her. Wren grabbed a round, matte black vase and brought it back toward me, quickly arranging a bouquet within it. I watched as she plucked flowers among the bundle, sorting them easily within the neck of the vase. She started with dark burgundy dahlias, following with mauve roses and white ranunculus, finishing with small sprigs of eucalyptus that perfumed the entire space with its soothing scent. It was gorgeous, similar to the types of arrangements Alex had gotten for me, and I considered taking a picture or making a note to have Wren recreate it for me another time.

She was quiet as she arranged the flowers, stepping back every so often and observing the arrangement from different angles, slightly adjusting the petals or snipping the stems shorter so they lay evenly alongside the others. It was nice, seeing her in her element, the opposing side to the flirty, talkative personality I had seen at Alex’s. Both were stillher, just two sides of the same coin. Like her outfit - a matching skirt and bandeau set, with large sunflowers printed on the white cotton - and the moody bouquet she just created. Opposites that somehow created a comprehensive whole.

As she finished the arrangement, she took a step back, looking up at me for the first time in a while, and continued her thought as if no time had passed. “I love my parents. We get together a couple of times a year, and we talk on the phone at least weekly. But they’ve never understood me.”

I watched a self-deprecating smile tug at her lips as she continued, “I know I sound like a sullen teenager. But it’s true. I’ve always been more brash than my family, joking and flirting more than they ever found appropriate. And when I wanted to start my business, they begged me to choose something more stable, thinking a floral business would never take off. They especially hated my darker arrangements, saying they were too morose and too ‘goth’ -” her sarcastic emphasis on the word made me laugh, “- to ever get any business. But with Dev and Alex and you, I don’t know. I never felt that disconnect. You guys all got me. It was so seamless, being fit into their little twosome. It just felt right. You know what I mean.”

She didn’t pose it as a question, but her words settled deep in my gut, the description matching exactly how I felt with them.

“Yeah,” I whispered, nodding as I admitted, “I know exactly what you mean.”

And when she pushed the finished arrangement in my direction, winking as she rested the familiar silver note card among the petals, it felt just like she said: right.

* * *

Whilewe neverplannedto hang out together, Dev was constantly at the house. He often worked out in the fully outfitted indoor gym he and Alex had installed in the basement, popped by to discuss business with Alex, and dragged boxes to and from the large shed they used for work. It sat further back on the property from the gardening shed, blending among the trees so well I hadn’t noticed it when I first saw the house. It looked big enough to be a pool house or an in-law suite, though I had never seen the inside. Alex had asked me early on in the week to avoid the space, and while I wasn’t sure what was inside, I knew it was likely either dangerous or confidential, and I respected the one boundary he placed on my stay here.

He also worked, of course, doing the ‘legwork’ of their business, meaning he spent his days tracking down targets or installing security cameras when people were less-than-aware of it.

But when Dev wasn’t doing any of those things, he was spending time with me. Either keeping me company at the house when I wasn’t working - which was less than normal, considering I had paused orders for my small business until I had a place to live - or cajoling me into a few reps of whatever exercise he was doing when I’d venture downstairs to interrupt his workout. He was a good teacher, encouraging but tough, but I was a terrible student, hating any form of exercise that required more effort than a walk.

After a few rounds of bickering over how many reps I should do, I was usually able to convince him to let me free with the promise of food. We’d often eat on the patio, or sometimes at the island if the kittens were awake. The two black balls of fur had adjusted well to their new home, spending most of their days laying in the rays of sun that filtered in through the large windows. Nyx and Chaos were aptly named, Nyx often hiding in the shadows before jumping out at your ankles - usually Dev’s - while Chaos jumped from the cabinets onto your shoulders without warning.

When we weren’t playing with the kittens, Dev and I chatted about work and Alex and Wren until one of the two would inevitably stop by, our one-on-one chats often turning into a family dinner. There was a reason Alex had such a large kitchen, I had quickly learned, and it was because everyone often congregated at his house.

There was always enough food to feed an army, a deep freezer full of meat ready to be defrosted at a moment’s notice and a fully-stocked pantry of essentials hidden in the basement. It seemed like a survivalist’s dream when I first stumbled upon it, but I realized how necessary it was when we ended up feeding Wren and Dev almost every other night in the week I lived at the house.

Even Bex had somewhat settled into our little group, though she kept herself distanced enough from everyone but me, mostly stopping by when she thought I’d be alone. We would go exploring in the few acres surrounding the house, attempting to carve out hiking paths through the trees with just our footfalls and a few markers we’d tied to trees as guidance. She was still looking for work, and when I brought up trying to get her a job at June’s studio, she promptly shut me down.

“I was offered a job recently, actually,” she confessed one afternoon, words barely making their way to me as I led us through a particularly tight patch of trees.

I twisted on my toes, almost losing my footing on the uneven ground, catching myself at the last minute on the trunk of a tree.

“What?! Why didn’t you tell me?” I couldn’t help the excitement in my voice, though I watched as Bex rolled her eyes at my dramatics. I knew she hadn’t been able to find a stable job since her court case. She had kept afloat by taking small-time jobs in retail and food service, where they were usually willing to overlook a criminal record, but I knew her true passion was computers.

Unfortunately, that was also where she had gotten into trouble before, meaning not many reputable companies were willing to take a chance on her past the background check process.

“Chill, mama bear.” I huffed at the rare nickname, which she only brought out when I was being especially mom-ish. “I’m not sure I’m going to take the job.”

“Why not?”

“It’s…personal. Anyway, I haven’t said no yet, I just asked for some time. It’s my dream job, really. But things might get complicated if I take it.” She hesitated a moment, and I turned back toward the path, allowing her to work out whether or not she wanted to say what was clearly on the tip of her tongue. After a few moments, she finally spoke back up, voice quiet as she asked, “What would you do? Risk the disaster?”

“To be honest, I wouldn’t take the risk. But look where that got me.” I gestured around us, not at the forest but at the situation I had found myself in. “Becoming friends with Alex was the most reckless thing I can remember doing in my life, and it’s been the best thing. So, don’t do what I would do. Do what you’ve always done and take the risk, but be careful.”

Bex didn’t respond for a while. I could only tell she was still behind me by the sound of her footfalls. But when the house came back into view, she suddenly spoke up again, “I know I said you lost yourself with Peter, and I won’t lie and say I was wrong. But I will say, here, at this house, with your new friends, it’s like you’ve found yourself again. And that’s because you took that risk, Ames. You got the fuck out of that situation, and you stayed out. And I couldn’t be more proud to watch you do it.”

* * *

By the timeFriday rolled around, I had forgotten there was an end date to our domesticity, our routine having already settled into something familiar and comfortable. Alex and I both had short days, so we drove into the city together with the plan to meet up and drive home early in the afternoon. We went for an early coffee, sitting at our usual table before he dropped me off at work, only to surprise me an hour later when he walked in the classroom door as I set up stations for my next class.

---