Page 21 of Rockstar Valentine

“Nothing,” I lie. I sniffle, trying to sound brave. “I’m just being silly. I guess I’m just... overwhelmed.” And I am overwhelmed. I was supposed to lose my virginity, not my heart. That was never what this was about. “It’s better if I go now, I think.”

“Mallory,” he says softly. I turn to look at him. “We had something special, didn’t we?”

I bite my lip and nod.

“I know it’s not ideal,” he says. “But I want you to know that I’ll always remember this night. Always.”

“I should go. I have papers to grade.”

He furrows his brow at me. “You havepreschoolpapers to grade?”

“It made more sense in my head before I said it.”

He sits up. “What’s going on? Why do you want to leave so soon?”

I take a deep breath. “I don’t want to get attached to something I can’t have. I’d rather just say goodbye now.”

He pulls away from me, like I’m the one hurting him. “Don’t do this, Mallory. Don’t just run away. We’re having a nice time.”

We were until I ruined it. “It’s not running away. It’s being realistic.”

He stares at me for a few moments, like he’s trying to read my mind. Then he nods slowly. “Okay. If that’s what you want, I won’t stop you.” He gets to his feet and helps me to mine. “I’ll call for the driver.”

How did I mess this up so badly? Everything was so perfect just two minutes ago. “Griffin—”

Griffin turns to me, his eyes searching mine. “Yeah?”

“I’m sorry,” I say, my voice cracking. “I just... I don’t know what I’m doing. I’m not good at... this.” I gesture between us, feeling foolish and exposed.

He steps closer. “You’re doing fine. This is how it goes after a one night stand. I should know. I’m the expert.” He shakes his head. “Goodbye, Mallory,” he says, his voice tight.

“Wait.” I grab his arm and he stops. I want to tell him that I’m sorry, that I want to stay, that I don’t want this to be goodbye. But I can’t find the words. Instead, I just stand there, my eyes boring into his.

Finally, he breaks the silence. “You don’t have to say it. I understand. You wanted someone to pop your cherry. Mission accomplished.”

That slaps me back into reality. “That’s not what this was about!”

He looks away. “I didn’t mean it like that. I just—”

“No, forget it. Just forget it,” I say, turning away from him.

“I’ve never had a fight with someone when we were both naked before,” he says, his voice low.

I can’t help but laugh. “Me either,” I say, shaking my head. “I liked the other stuff we did naked better.”

“Me too.”

We’re quiet for a moment. He’s probably thinking about how much easier one night stands are with experienced groupies who don’t gift-wrap their hearts for one night of sex.

But that’s who I am, I guess.

“Why don’t you stay?” he asks. “I’m not ready to say goodbye.”

“If I stay, I’ll fall in love with you,” I answer honestly. “I probably already have. It’s not your fault. You didn’t lead me on or anything. I knew what I was getting into.”

“Maybe you should stay anyway,” he says, his voice soft.

I want to. I really do. But I can’t. I can’t stay and watch Griffin go back to being the rock star he was before I came along.

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