Page 53 of Ruined (The Knights of Ruin)

It was so intense. So hungry. As if he’d never seen a naked woman in all his life.

A feeling swept through me—the same one I’d felt the night before. A feeling of power, of strength.

He wanted me. He was desperate for me.

I straightened, threw my shoulders back, and his gaze dropped to my breasts, then down further. A stain of red appeared on his high cheekbones.

‘Come here,’ he ordered, his voice thickened and rough.

I hated being told what to do, and yet I found myself going to him all the same. Like there was a collar around my neck and he held the leash, drawing me closer and closer.

I watched his face as I got nearer, watched him watch me, my heartbeat racing. My nipples had hardened and I could feel slickness between my legs, the heavy ache of desire making my breathing short and fast.

There was a part of me that didn’t want him to see me so obviously turned on by him, but after last night that ship had sailed. I couldn’t hide it. And he certainly didn’t bother, making no effort to conceal the long, thick outline of his cock pressing against his zipper.

Breathless, I stopped in front of his outstretched legs, looking down at him. ‘So?’ I said awkwardly. ‘Here I am.’

He didn’t move and only patted his lap. ‘Facing me, kitten.’

He definitely wasn’t going to make this easy for me, was he? Facing him meant kneeling astride him and looking into his eyes...meant being vulnerable to him. And he knew it.

That challenge glittered in his black gaze—the one I couldn’t refuse. So I moved towards him, climbing into his lap and spreading my thighs so I could straddle him. He made no move to help me, his attention dropping to my swaying breasts as I gingerly settled myself astride him.

My cheeks flamed. I wasn’t used to this—to being naked in front of him while he was fully dressed, to him watching me so intently. Then I noticed that the lines of his gorgeous face were pulled taut and his mouth set hard. His body beneath mine was rock hard, as if every muscle was clenched tight.

He was holding himself back.

The realisation made my embarrassment fade, leaving me aware of how rough the denim of his jeans felt against the insides of my thighs, of how hot he was, like lying right next to a roaring fire.

He didn’t take his eyes off me, staring unspeaking as he lifted his hands and settled them lightly on my hips. I trembled, his touch setting off electric shocks that spider webbed all over my skin, catching me in a fine net of heat I couldn’t escape from.

I tried to take a breath, but it sounded more like a gasp, and I realised with a start, as his fingers tightened on my bare flesh, that he was pushing me down onto him with slow, irresistible pressure.

Unable to do anything else, I let him push until I was sitting properly on him. Until the soft, vulnerable flesh of my pussy was pressed against the denim of his jeans and the rigid outline of his cock underneath it. Just that bit of friction caused the net of heat to tighten, pulling against my skin, making me tremble even harder.

‘You wanted to talk?’ His voice was soft and rough. ‘Then let’s talk.’

Strange to sit naked on him like this and look into his inky eyes. I couldn’t get rid of the almost overwhelming urge to move on him. To rub myself against the hard outline of his dick. Pull up his T-shirt, touch his smooth, hot skin. I wanted to kiss him, drive him crazy, make him feel the same terrifying desperation he made me feel.

But I didn’t. My voice had got stuck in my throat and I couldn’t speak. Dumb. I’d never been a woman who let herself get overwhelmed by a man—not even when I’d been in love with Justin—and yet apparently all I needed was to be sitting naked in Smoke’s lap and I couldn’t say a word.

‘You don’t trust me, do you?’

I could hear the accusation in his voice, could hear the hurt, too. It made me hurt in response. Jesus, all I seemed to be able to do lately was hurt him.

‘No,’ I said thickly. ‘It’s not that.’

‘Yeah, it is.’

His thumbs moved on my hips, stroking me, sending flames over my skin.

‘If you trusted me this wouldn’t be scary.’

I met his searing black eyes. The intense heat in them nearly stole my breath. ‘I do trust you. It’s just...’ I stopped, trying to get my thoughts together. ‘It’s scary because you’re my closest friend. You’re all I have. And I don’t want to fuck that up. I don’t...’

My voice shook, but I knew I was going to have to say it. I had to make myself.

‘I don’t want to lose you.’

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